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Chapters

00:00 - Jersey Swap and Bunker Banter

07:18 - Kevin's AA Intervention

16:25 - Mysterious Space Object Heading to Earth

31:20 - Pat's Dating App Adventures

56:26 - Dating App Horror Stories

01:14:51 - Dating App Economics and Profiles

01:33:36 - Show Wrap-Up and Future Guests

Transcript
WEBVTT

00:00:00.059 --> 00:00:03.442
What we do in life echoes in eternity.

00:00:30.696 --> 00:00:31.858
T-T-T-T-T.

00:00:42.075 --> 00:00:42.295
Yeah.

00:00:44.661 --> 00:00:46.606
So weird seeing two of us on that screen.

00:00:46.606 --> 00:00:47.389
It is weird.

00:00:47.389 --> 00:00:50.947
We got big news, apparently.

00:00:50.947 --> 00:01:01.320
I let Kevin have his smartphone in his room Because he's watching oh, down here in the fucking bunker.

00:01:01.320 --> 00:01:04.784
I love the bunker, I really do.

00:01:04.784 --> 00:01:06.085
Where's the maid?

00:01:06.085 --> 00:01:07.727
She hasn't been here in about two weeks.

00:01:07.727 --> 00:01:10.067
The maid hasn't been here in about three years.

00:01:10.067 --> 00:01:10.903
It's uh.

00:01:10.903 --> 00:01:13.786
We probably should clean it up one day.

00:01:13.786 --> 00:01:17.829
It's almost like a house that got hit by a hurricane or something.

00:01:17.829 --> 00:01:21.686
It's got the big axe on the outside waiting for people to come through.

00:01:21.686 --> 00:01:29.750
Although all the empty liquor bottles were removed yeah, of course that's removed, but not the cups that have the fucking fungus in it.

00:01:29.750 --> 00:01:31.706
Jesus Well, bring your cup upstairs.

00:01:31.706 --> 00:01:35.471
Oh, I thought we had somebody that does that.

00:01:35.471 --> 00:01:36.822
No, we're lucky.

00:01:36.822 --> 00:01:38.707
We get craft services every once in a while.

00:01:38.707 --> 00:01:39.248
This is true.

00:01:39.248 --> 00:01:40.132
This is true.

00:01:40.540 --> 00:01:44.831
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another fine episode of the Take a Deep Show.

00:01:44.831 --> 00:01:48.387
You may be a little confused if you're looking at the screen right now.

00:01:48.387 --> 00:01:50.251
Only slightly, a little bit.

00:01:50.251 --> 00:01:57.233
So you have two large fat men and not one skinny Tom Hanks here from Philadelphia.

00:01:57.233 --> 00:02:05.772
Kevin has a drinking problem, so we've decided, we had a team meeting and we've sent him off to Santa Barbara.

00:02:05.772 --> 00:02:19.645
We had a small intervention and he's in AA because of his hijacking antics and we hope that he makes it back, unlike Tommy O who's still in a K-hole from four years ago With his Santa suit on.

00:02:19.645 --> 00:02:28.663
But you know, we gave Kevin the offer of being fired or going to AA and he made the right choice.

00:02:28.663 --> 00:02:30.468
We love you, kev.

00:02:30.468 --> 00:02:31.831
Oh, get well soon.

00:02:31.831 --> 00:02:35.030
How is he on the chat if he's in AA right now?

00:02:35.030 --> 00:02:37.405
I just don't get it.

00:02:37.405 --> 00:02:40.168
They let him have fucking.

00:02:40.168 --> 00:02:40.530
Look at this.

00:02:40.530 --> 00:02:41.780
Apparently they let him.

00:02:41.860 --> 00:02:43.206
I have no problem drinking.

00:02:43.206 --> 00:02:44.943
That's of course, kevin.

00:02:44.943 --> 00:02:50.108
You're going to say that when you're in AA, so you might want to sit down with your counselors.

00:02:50.108 --> 00:02:53.489
Counselors are going to rush your room and take your phone again.

00:02:53.489 --> 00:03:00.520
Actually, can we call them to confiscate his technology Because he should not have that in his room right now.

00:03:00.520 --> 00:03:01.644
Is it really technology?

00:03:01.783 --> 00:03:06.401
He probably says I don't know what Google is, first of all.

00:03:06.963 --> 00:03:10.817
That's why I'm wondering how he even knows what to do, burgess.

00:03:10.817 --> 00:03:11.479
What's going on?

00:03:11.479 --> 00:03:11.639
Buddy?

00:03:11.639 --> 00:03:15.947
The news, the news, breaking news.

00:03:15.947 --> 00:03:19.653
Orbs, Orbs.

00:03:19.653 --> 00:03:22.644
Tommy Oster's on Tommy O.

00:03:22.644 --> 00:03:26.247
Oh my god, this is a crazy event.

00:03:26.247 --> 00:03:26.909
You know what?

00:03:26.909 --> 00:03:31.265
Maybe you and I should just do the show together, because it seems like, I mean, it's an all-star cast.

00:03:31.265 --> 00:03:35.911
Right now, obs is in Santa Barbara at Joan Rivers fucking clinic.

00:03:35.911 --> 00:03:48.225
He agreed to AA and agreed to not hijack the show anymore, and we have a sighting like a comet Tommy Oster's in the chat.

00:03:48.225 --> 00:03:50.683
Tommy Oster finally made it out of the K-hole.

00:03:50.683 --> 00:03:52.807
How's your shmeet, tommy, doing?

00:03:52.807 --> 00:03:57.377
Well, we love you Great, kristen's wide hands.

00:03:58.498 --> 00:04:01.867
Oh, gripping that, oh come on Awesome, not right to that.

00:04:02.308 --> 00:04:02.991
Not right to that.

00:04:03.680 --> 00:04:05.728
So yeah, so Ops is in AA.

00:04:05.728 --> 00:04:17.788
Hopefully he gets the treatment that he needs, because I'm tired of feeling like the Wesley Snipes in Passenger 57 and have to take care of the hijackers.

00:04:17.788 --> 00:04:20.153
Wow, you know, that was strong A little bit.

00:04:20.153 --> 00:04:21.485
I like that little reference.

00:04:21.504 --> 00:04:22.007
It's good too.

00:04:22.026 --> 00:04:22.367
I liked it.

00:04:22.367 --> 00:04:29.545
But good thing is, I received a gift today from Maddie and I don't know what it is yet.

00:04:29.545 --> 00:04:30.930
It's in a plastic bag.

00:04:30.930 --> 00:04:33.088
It looks like a jersey.

00:04:33.088 --> 00:04:36.165
I can't see shit in the dark.

00:04:36.165 --> 00:04:39.605
Dude, I know I was thinking you don't.

00:04:39.605 --> 00:04:41.564
Is this a Hooters jersey?

00:04:41.564 --> 00:04:43.565
Not a Hooters jersey?

00:04:43.565 --> 00:04:44.127
What do you think?

00:04:44.127 --> 00:04:49.175
Oh, it's nice material.

00:04:49.175 --> 00:04:51.125
What is this, dude?

00:04:51.125 --> 00:04:52.670
That is nice.

00:04:52.670 --> 00:04:58.716
Don't forget to look at it back.

00:04:58.716 --> 00:04:59.399
Shut the fuck up, dude.

00:04:59.399 --> 00:05:00.732
That is awesome.

00:05:00.732 --> 00:05:04.807
Bro Blanton, you're this made.

00:05:04.807 --> 00:05:05.269
I did, did.

00:05:05.269 --> 00:05:05.771
Why?

00:05:05.771 --> 00:05:10.285
What have I done nice to you To deserve this?

00:05:10.285 --> 00:05:12.327
I'm gonna cry, you're not wrong.

00:05:12.327 --> 00:05:13.598
I like this a lot, dude.

00:05:13.598 --> 00:05:15.225
This is a cool fucking material.

00:05:15.225 --> 00:05:15.708
What is this?

00:05:16.322 --> 00:05:17.666
We all have our drinking jerseys.

00:05:17.666 --> 00:05:19.266
Now We'll have to bust them out for a show.

00:05:19.266 --> 00:05:21.526
Well, kevin can't.

00:05:21.526 --> 00:05:24.600
He's got a Woodford one.

00:05:24.600 --> 00:05:25.863
Oh, he has to wear.

00:05:25.863 --> 00:05:27.709
I've been sober for a certain amount of days.

00:05:27.709 --> 00:05:28.250
That has a.

00:05:28.250 --> 00:05:33.649
I used to drink Woodford that has a grease board on it, so we can count how many days.

00:05:33.649 --> 00:05:37.208
Okay, excellent, do you know what, dude, I'm going to put this on right now?

00:05:37.208 --> 00:05:39.346
Excellent, I feel bad.

00:05:39.346 --> 00:05:40.050
I should have wore mine.

00:05:40.050 --> 00:05:41.956
What did you get?

00:05:41.956 --> 00:05:42.379
Like a tent?

00:05:42.379 --> 00:05:43.519
I got an Eagle Rare.

00:05:43.519 --> 00:05:44.184
Where did you get this?

00:05:44.184 --> 00:05:44.324
A tent.

00:05:44.324 --> 00:05:45.250
I got an eagle, rare Eagle, rare jersey.

00:05:45.250 --> 00:05:45.834
Where did you get this?

00:05:45.834 --> 00:05:47.399
I saw it on the internet.

00:05:47.399 --> 00:05:55.610
It reminds me of something Diddy would wear, I don't know why.

00:05:55.610 --> 00:06:07.519
If I ever see you coming anywhere near me With baby oil, we're fighting, alright, alright, okay, button's gonna fly over that and kill somebody.

00:06:07.519 --> 00:06:10.586
We're good, let's go.

00:06:10.920 --> 00:06:11.745
Look at this guy.

00:06:12.863 --> 00:06:15.644
I'm gonna wear this tomorrow during our game, wearing his drinking jersey.

00:06:15.644 --> 00:06:16.348
Let's go.

00:06:16.348 --> 00:06:19.567
This should be our fucking Our cornhole jerseys.

00:06:19.567 --> 00:06:20.865
We could do that.

00:06:20.865 --> 00:06:22.607
This is nice, bro.

00:06:22.607 --> 00:06:24.403
Tommy O asked if it's a 3XL.

00:06:24.403 --> 00:06:26.327
Did he ask that?

00:06:26.327 --> 00:06:26.769
He did.

00:06:26.769 --> 00:06:27.471
You know what, tom?

00:06:27.471 --> 00:06:28.632
Because you're thinning out.

00:06:28.632 --> 00:06:29.134
We could do that.

00:06:29.134 --> 00:06:29.536
This is nice, bro.

00:06:29.536 --> 00:06:30.478
Tommy O asked if it's a 3XL.

00:06:30.478 --> 00:06:30.899
Did he ask that?

00:06:30.899 --> 00:06:31.038
He did.

00:06:31.038 --> 00:06:31.459
You know what, tom?

00:06:31.459 --> 00:06:34.713
Because you're thinning out and you think you're above everybody else.

00:06:34.713 --> 00:06:35.278
So what if it's a 3XL?

00:06:35.278 --> 00:06:35.598
Is it a 3XL?

00:06:35.598 --> 00:06:38.023
It is not.

00:06:38.023 --> 00:06:39.024
I'm going to guess it's a 2.

00:06:39.024 --> 00:06:40.726
I don't know if I went 2.

00:06:40.726 --> 00:06:41.387
You went.

00:06:41.487 --> 00:06:41.809
XL.

00:06:41.809 --> 00:06:42.971
If this is an XL.

00:06:43.050 --> 00:06:43.951
I feel thinner.

00:06:44.372 --> 00:06:44.653
Nice.

00:06:44.874 --> 00:06:48.444
Nice, good, but I am swole.

00:06:48.444 --> 00:06:50.209
What did you have?

00:06:50.209 --> 00:06:50.930
A lot of salt today.

00:06:50.930 --> 00:06:54.401
Bro, you're at the fucking Dutchess County Fair.

00:06:54.401 --> 00:06:55.728
You're eating everything you shouldn't be.

00:06:55.800 --> 00:06:57.105
I'm not touching anything up there, dude.

00:06:57.105 --> 00:07:01.430
After one meal I had up there and how much it costs, oh, is that bad.

00:07:01.430 --> 00:07:05.672
I had fucking three chicken fingers, fries and a soda.

00:07:05.672 --> 00:07:07.642
What's your guesstimate?

00:07:07.642 --> 00:07:09.225
25.

00:07:09.225 --> 00:07:12.353
Very close $30.

00:07:12.353 --> 00:07:15.428
$30 for three chicken fingers, fries and a soda.

00:07:15.428 --> 00:07:17.507
Correct, were they fantastic chicken fingers?

00:07:17.507 --> 00:07:23.252
They were the fucking frozen chicken fingers you get at a pizza restaurant.

00:07:23.252 --> 00:07:25.225
Oh no, awful.

00:07:25.225 --> 00:07:26.682
Oh no, absolutely awful.

00:07:26.682 --> 00:07:31.124
And um, did you throw them back at the guy's face?

00:07:31.124 --> 00:07:37.766
No, but the fries were god awful, greasy, soggy, like Tommy's dick.

00:07:37.766 --> 00:07:40.942
Oh, and it was not good.

00:07:41.826 --> 00:07:47.987
Fat guy in a little coat, you know what, kevin, I hope you're there for more than your.

00:07:47.987 --> 00:07:48.387
And it was not good.

00:07:48.387 --> 00:07:50.850
Fat guy in a little coat, you know what, kevin, I hope you're there for more than your 90 days.

00:07:50.850 --> 00:07:51.291
That's allotted.

00:07:51.291 --> 00:07:51.733
Well, you know what?

00:07:51.733 --> 00:07:54.096
When you're in AA, they don't like to give you any medications or anything.

00:07:54.096 --> 00:07:57.625
I hope he's getting his AIDS cocktail.

00:07:57.625 --> 00:07:58.826
We don't want that to get any worse.

00:07:58.826 --> 00:08:01.091
We need to take care of those lesions you have pal.

00:08:01.091 --> 00:08:06.401
Okay, and then we'll send you a nice little single of a CD.

00:08:06.401 --> 00:08:07.747
You have a CD player out there.

00:08:07.747 --> 00:08:14.423
We'll send you the fucking song Philadelphia from fucking Bruce Springsteen, awful, is this thing still going?

00:08:14.423 --> 00:08:20.461
God, it sounds like a fucking jet engine is going off in my ear right now.

00:08:20.461 --> 00:08:22.865
Well, it's a very big computer.

00:08:22.865 --> 00:08:23.687
It has to stay cool.

00:08:23.687 --> 00:08:25.767
It shouldn't be going off all the time.

00:08:25.767 --> 00:08:27.206
I hear what you're saying.

00:08:27.206 --> 00:08:29.507
I don't think you can hear what's going on.

00:08:29.507 --> 00:08:30.180
Oh, I hear it.

00:08:30.180 --> 00:08:31.846
Let's shut this fan off, people.

00:08:31.846 --> 00:08:33.746
Well, let's not blow the computer up either.

00:08:33.767 --> 00:08:34.442
No, no, it's okay.

00:08:34.864 --> 00:08:40.964
It's all right, let's uh, I don't even know how to shut it off.

00:08:40.964 --> 00:08:44.648
Well, yeah, okay, let me guess you have a plan, but you're not going to follow through with it.

00:08:44.648 --> 00:08:49.251
Oh, I mean, come on, unless there's a dirt bike involved.

00:08:49.251 --> 00:08:53.135
If he can find himself a dirt bike over there, he'll ride that clear cross country.

00:08:53.135 --> 00:08:56.942
No, I don't even know how to shut this fucking up.

00:08:56.962 --> 00:08:57.583
Could you stop?

00:08:57.583 --> 00:08:59.164
I don't even know how to shut it.

00:08:59.225 --> 00:09:03.769
It sounds like I have the Maverick flying fucking F-16s by me.

00:09:03.769 --> 00:09:07.634
Well, tell them not to buzz the tower and just leave it be before you fuck the computer.

00:09:07.634 --> 00:09:09.376
Oh, that's why, there it is.

00:09:09.376 --> 00:09:12.043
I put it on quiet.

00:09:12.043 --> 00:09:16.412
There, it is All right, okay, all right, back to the show.

00:09:16.412 --> 00:09:16.711
We're back.

00:09:16.711 --> 00:09:17.413
We're back.

00:09:17.413 --> 00:09:20.590
So what's been going on in the world?

00:09:20.590 --> 00:09:24.386
Here's the one thing I saw on the news the other day.

00:09:24.386 --> 00:09:41.485
We're on a video, I think on tiktok is this object that's been coming towards the earth that got picked up on the web telescope really it's traveling in light speed.

00:09:43.168 --> 00:09:44.609
It's 12 miles wide.

00:09:44.609 --> 00:09:48.193
Did Kevin throw it into outer space?

00:09:48.193 --> 00:09:50.115
He has an app for that, I think.

00:09:50.115 --> 00:09:53.278
Okay, just like his earthquake app.

00:09:53.278 --> 00:10:05.667
But um, now here's the thing though it was traveling light speed in one direction, uh-huh Changed directions towards Earth and it's traveling in light speed again, as if it's steering towards us.

00:10:05.667 --> 00:10:13.184
It sounds like Guardians of the Galaxy is coming for Earth the size of Texas.

00:10:13.184 --> 00:10:15.184
Huh, 12 miles wide.

00:10:15.184 --> 00:10:16.149
12 miles wide.

00:10:16.149 --> 00:10:20.183
What's crazy is they?

00:10:20.183 --> 00:10:23.788
When that was found?

00:10:23.788 --> 00:10:37.773
A few weeks ago, they discovered this radio signal that's coming from outer space and it goes off in five-minute intervals every 22 minutes.

00:10:37.773 --> 00:10:41.639
Are you now repeating the plot of Independence Day?

00:10:41.639 --> 00:10:44.690
It's dude decree.

00:10:44.690 --> 00:10:48.327
It's exactly like Independence Day.

00:10:48.327 --> 00:10:48.688
It's dude decree.

00:10:48.688 --> 00:10:49.412
It's exactly like Independence Day.

00:10:49.412 --> 00:10:50.336
I'm not even joking.

00:10:50.336 --> 00:10:53.369
I think Jeff Goldblum should fucking do something about this.

00:10:53.369 --> 00:10:55.948
Well, let's get him to fuck over there and figure this out.

00:10:55.948 --> 00:10:57.799
Jesus Christ over here.

00:10:57.799 --> 00:11:02.850
Where is Manuela fucking to clean up over here?

00:11:02.850 --> 00:11:09.759
Jesus Orbs, I think Pat's saying you need to hire someone to tidy up the house.

00:11:09.879 --> 00:11:10.965
No, we just put a wig on Obi.

00:11:10.965 --> 00:11:14.806
Oh, that's it, let's have him talk broken Spanish.

00:11:15.025 --> 00:11:17.331
Less will get done Por favor.

00:11:17.331 --> 00:11:26.918
But they don't know if it's a comet, nor do they know if it's an alien spacecraft.

00:11:26.918 --> 00:11:28.923
But where are you getting this information?

00:11:28.923 --> 00:11:29.966
Oh, it's all over the news, dude.

00:11:29.966 --> 00:11:31.470
Well, but which networks?

00:11:31.470 --> 00:11:32.741
Because you, I can't.

00:11:32.741 --> 00:11:34.748
I can't trust anything that anyone says on the news.

00:11:34.748 --> 00:11:38.860
Uh, so this is give me one second.

00:11:38.860 --> 00:11:47.874
This is from newscom.

00:11:47.874 --> 00:11:52.424
Oh, that must be reliable, reputable source right there.

00:11:52.424 --> 00:12:03.688
But it says a mystery object believed to be a spacecraft is hurtling towards Earth, reigniting speculation about extraterrestrial life.

00:12:04.681 --> 00:12:08.168
A mystery object coming towards Earth at breakneck speed.

00:12:08.168 --> 00:12:12.427
Breakneck speed, I would call it light speed if they wanted to.

00:12:12.427 --> 00:12:18.932
However, which way they want to go, so the scientists have called it 31 Atlas.

00:12:18.932 --> 00:12:22.722
Reason why 31,.

00:12:22.722 --> 00:12:28.160
It's the third object since 2019 that they've discovered that's coming towards earth.

00:12:28.160 --> 00:12:29.322
Oh, terrific.

00:12:29.322 --> 00:12:34.230
Uh, the number one is for one second.

00:12:34.230 --> 00:12:35.633
I know.

00:12:35.633 --> 00:12:40.927
I read it uh, yep, yep, um, huh, uh-huh.

00:12:40.927 --> 00:12:42.711
Has nasa urinating in their pants?

00:12:42.711 --> 00:12:48.123
Uh, no, because nasa's like, discovered this, fucking, this signal too.

00:12:48.464 --> 00:12:51.821
Or this guy from australia discovered this signal that's coming from to?

00:12:51.821 --> 00:12:52.822
How drunk was he?

00:12:52.822 --> 00:12:56.751
He was from australia, so he was probably hitting up some something.

00:12:56.751 --> 00:12:57.821
Yeah, with someone.

00:12:57.821 --> 00:13:04.230
Uh, fosters australian for beer, so he was probably drinking that.

00:13:04.230 --> 00:13:21.302
But he discovered it like mistakenly Because he was going, he was like reviewing stuff, that um signals that they were getting from the sky, and lo and behold, this thing got like overlooked and then he fucking gave the information to his mentor, some lady and she was reviewing it.

00:13:21.302 --> 00:13:23.666
Then the signal went away for like months.

00:13:23.666 --> 00:13:29.187
Then it came back because they were scanning the sky and shit, and now they found the spot where it's coming from.

00:13:29.187 --> 00:13:36.048
And it comes every 22 minutes at five minute intervals From this, from the space where it is Not from, it's not from this.

00:13:36.048 --> 00:13:39.384
Oh, that's what I'm saying, like what's going on?

00:13:39.384 --> 00:13:41.548
So I think we're going to have an invasion.

00:13:41.548 --> 00:13:43.283
Somebody call Russell Case.

00:13:43.283 --> 00:13:44.787
Who's Russell Case?

00:13:44.787 --> 00:13:47.052
Really?

00:13:47.052 --> 00:13:50.346
Why am I forgetting this From Independence Day?

00:13:50.346 --> 00:13:51.548
Which one's Russell?

00:13:52.130 --> 00:13:52.552
Oh yeah.

00:13:53.039 --> 00:13:54.104
Flew the jet into the thing.

00:13:54.104 --> 00:13:58.126
I'm back, good old fucking cousin fucking.

00:13:58.287 --> 00:13:59.110
Cousin Eddie yeah.

00:13:59.230 --> 00:14:07.193
Yes, so this thing is projected, or estimated, to be 12 miles wide.

00:14:07.193 --> 00:14:17.274
It's whizzing through our solar system on a trajectory that will bring it within 170 million miles on December 19th.

00:14:17.274 --> 00:14:17.815
How far is?

00:14:17.815 --> 00:14:22.304
I mean, is that close technically, kind of it's not light years?

00:14:22.304 --> 00:14:26.150
No, so you figure, 170 million miles, what the moon?

00:14:26.150 --> 00:14:27.456
250 000?

00:14:27.456 --> 00:14:28.399
Well, I don't know.

00:14:28.399 --> 00:14:33.309
We've never really been there this, so this is where he didn't.

00:14:33.309 --> 00:14:34.572
This is the funny part.

00:14:34.572 --> 00:14:48.248
So you say that, right, oh, boy, and the funny part is the signal, the signal's coming from the moon.

00:14:48.248 --> 00:14:56.253
No, so I guess they sent out this fucking, this thing out in outer space.

00:14:56.253 --> 00:15:03.778
It's 140 million miles away, right, right, they're receiving messages from that thing they sent out.

00:15:03.778 --> 00:15:06.644
I was like, wow, that's funny.

00:15:06.644 --> 00:15:16.946
So you're getting that from 140 million miles away, but yet you're saying that you can't send anybody to the moon because the communications are bad.

00:15:16.946 --> 00:15:17.426
You know what I mean.

00:15:17.426 --> 00:15:18.768
I do know what you mean.

00:15:19.509 --> 00:15:20.630
You know Avi Loeb?

00:15:20.630 --> 00:15:21.172
Oh, there, it is.

00:15:21.172 --> 00:15:21.572
The dude from.

00:15:21.572 --> 00:15:23.735
That's what did, uh, what it was.

00:15:23.735 --> 00:15:25.017
Avi Loeb oh, there, it is.

00:15:25.017 --> 00:15:29.666
The dude from uh, that's that's the name I remember Says it could be a ship.

00:15:29.666 --> 00:15:33.548
He has said it about what's that word?

00:15:33.548 --> 00:15:34.910
I can't say it.

00:15:34.910 --> 00:15:37.280
Jesus Christ, I can't even fucking read that.

00:15:37.280 --> 00:15:40.784
Kevin Numerous Um, amnu, amnu, amnu, he's a quack.

00:15:40.784 --> 00:15:42.687
Aminew, aminew, aminew, he's a quack.

00:15:42.687 --> 00:15:46.650
Well, I mean, that's why Kevin follows him, that makes sense.

00:15:47.072 --> 00:15:48.432
Is he on your Earthquake app too?

00:15:48.432 --> 00:15:51.235
Kev, is that Lisa Loeb's husband?

00:15:51.235 --> 00:15:55.931
Hello, what was her song?

00:15:55.931 --> 00:16:00.485
Again, I don't remember.

00:16:00.485 --> 00:16:01.307
Fuck, it was catchy.

00:16:01.307 --> 00:16:03.412
It was catchy, you know it was.

00:16:03.412 --> 00:16:04.234
It was a one-hit wonder.

00:16:04.234 --> 00:16:07.361
No, Fuck, I can't remember the name.

00:16:07.361 --> 00:16:19.993
But I mean, is there a chance that there's actually a spaceship that's 12 miles wide?

00:16:19.993 --> 00:16:26.705
I mean, it's really depicting Independence Day or Thanos' ship either.

00:16:26.705 --> 00:16:27.413
Either way, that would be awesome.

00:16:27.413 --> 00:16:30.316
Just one day you show up.

00:16:30.316 --> 00:16:31.903
You're walking around Fucking.

00:16:31.903 --> 00:16:33.668
Captain America comes flying through.

00:16:33.668 --> 00:16:34.966
I'm like I'm in buddy.

00:16:34.966 --> 00:16:35.965
Where's my suit?

00:16:35.965 --> 00:16:39.931
Put on your Blanton's jersey and get in there, that's it.

00:16:40.568 --> 00:16:45.730
We'll be the fucking what's a good, fucking hero name.

00:16:45.730 --> 00:16:46.513
Then we're just drunk.

00:16:46.513 --> 00:16:59.971
My hidden talent is throwing empty beer cans at people and taking them out, but the beer cans I throw turn into fucking ninja blades and that's it.

00:16:59.971 --> 00:17:02.965
I mean, do you deep down inside?

00:17:02.965 --> 00:17:04.969
Do you believe there's a chance?

00:17:04.969 --> 00:17:05.871
That?

00:17:05.871 --> 00:17:08.925
I absolutely believe that there's a chance.

00:17:08.925 --> 00:17:14.644
Yes, okay, all right, I want to believe.

00:17:14.644 --> 00:17:15.286
I really do.

00:17:15.286 --> 00:17:16.250
I really do.

00:17:16.250 --> 00:17:22.489
I'm not going to believe it until something hits the earth and people, you know they start shooting at us.

00:17:22.489 --> 00:17:23.558
And what are you saying?

00:17:23.558 --> 00:17:26.890
It's just a moo-m-ay, as is how you.

00:17:26.890 --> 00:17:28.424
What has he been drinking again?

00:17:28.424 --> 00:17:30.905
Dude, you're not supposed to be drinking at rehab.

00:17:30.905 --> 00:17:37.923
Amu-amu, amu-amu, oh, oh, is he trying to say nanu-nanu Mork from Ork?

00:17:37.923 --> 00:17:41.592
Okay, cool, that's good.

00:17:41.592 --> 00:17:48.349
Oh, mano-a-mano Fisticuffs Rochambeau.

00:17:48.349 --> 00:17:48.838
What's going on?

00:17:48.838 --> 00:17:52.691
This is awesome, even when he gets back from the Betty Ford clinic.

00:17:53.064 --> 00:17:54.579
I think we should leave him outside the studio.

00:17:55.000 --> 00:18:00.000
He's not learning because he's hijacking the chat Unbelievable.

00:18:00.000 --> 00:18:02.588
All you do is see his name, nobody else's.

00:18:02.588 --> 00:18:05.126
God, give the fans a chance.

00:18:05.126 --> 00:18:09.046
Kev, jesus, it's unbelievable.

00:18:09.046 --> 00:18:11.185
But I don't know.

00:18:11.185 --> 00:18:25.792
I want to believe it, dude, I really do, and I would honestly go nuts if, like a mothership, was like right outside of Earth and then like deployed other ships.

00:18:25.792 --> 00:18:28.435
But the only way.

00:18:28.435 --> 00:18:29.557
Oh, here we go.

00:18:29.557 --> 00:18:35.169
Oh, bubba, joe's watching how you doing.

00:18:35.169 --> 00:18:37.952
Joe, wait one second, don't you talk yet.

00:18:37.952 --> 00:18:38.674
See, here we go.

00:18:38.795 --> 00:18:41.412
I can't even take his phone call because, oh, who's calling in?

00:18:41.412 --> 00:18:42.336
Who do you think's calling in?

00:18:42.336 --> 00:18:42.898
Oh no.

00:18:42.898 --> 00:18:47.247
Who do you think hello, so it?

00:18:47.247 --> 00:18:47.406
Oh no.

00:18:47.406 --> 00:18:48.489
Who do you think Hello, so it's not working.

00:18:48.489 --> 00:18:51.755
Oh, here we go, hello, hello.

00:18:51.755 --> 00:18:55.609
How do you have a phone in the Betty Ford Clinic?

00:18:55.609 --> 00:18:57.627
I didn't think you were allowed apparatuses.

00:18:57.627 --> 00:19:01.770
I'm wondering, because you're not supposed to have any type of fucking technology.

00:19:01.770 --> 00:19:07.756
You're supposed to be in a group right now because it's three hours, and you're supposed to be in a group right now because it's three hours and you're supposed to be talking.

00:19:07.756 --> 00:19:09.182
You're supposed to be getting going with your 12 steps.

00:19:09.182 --> 00:19:12.330
So how's it in the clinic?

00:19:12.330 --> 00:19:12.731
Is it good?

00:19:13.940 --> 00:19:15.346
Yeah, it's good the walls are a little white.

00:19:16.323 --> 00:19:18.769
I mean it's costing the show a fortune, but I gotta be white.

00:19:20.779 --> 00:19:22.363
Yeah, we better monetize quick then.

00:19:24.227 --> 00:19:25.910
So you're saying you're going to be there for a while?

00:19:25.910 --> 00:19:27.153
Is what you're saying?

00:19:30.142 --> 00:19:31.405
Well, no, a couple more hours.

00:19:32.028 --> 00:19:35.741
Fastest recovery in the world you got.

00:19:35.761 --> 00:19:36.844
Gunner, fucking breaking you out.

00:19:37.365 --> 00:19:37.646
I do.

00:19:37.646 --> 00:19:43.365
You got two dirt bikes outside of the Betty Ford A dirt bike and a sidecar.

00:19:43.385 --> 00:19:46.792
We're going to hit the cash register at the cafeteria first and we can get out.

00:19:48.305 --> 00:19:50.461
First of all, you have to set up a.

00:19:50.461 --> 00:19:51.306
What do you call it?

00:19:51.306 --> 00:19:58.788
Set some bombs off, a little fucking decoy, Decoy, yep, and then you run Once you do that.

00:19:59.011 --> 00:20:05.647
I was going to clog the toilet in the hall, so everyone would kind of go that way, and I'm going to go the other way.

00:20:06.601 --> 00:20:12.894
Did Mr Pika drop off some fucking M-80s to you to blow up the toilet bowl Just?

00:20:12.913 --> 00:20:15.140
wondering Dude, you see he got a hole-in-one today.

00:20:15.300 --> 00:20:16.345
You just stole my thunder.

00:20:16.345 --> 00:20:17.228
I was just going to say that.

00:20:17.460 --> 00:20:18.704
Yeah, it was on Facebook.

00:20:18.744 --> 00:20:19.989
Oh, I didn't see that, yep.

00:20:28.700 --> 00:20:29.403
God, I'll never do that.

00:20:29.403 --> 00:20:30.509
Pk, you owe us all a drink for hitting hole-in-one.

00:20:30.509 --> 00:20:31.292
The way you pronounce it is Amuamua.

00:20:31.292 --> 00:20:32.500
Remember that big, long like asteroid thing yeah.

00:20:32.500 --> 00:20:36.590
Remember that that's the same guy said that about.

00:20:36.740 --> 00:20:39.569
I met a guy with that name in Hawaii one time Amuamua.

00:20:39.569 --> 00:20:44.330
Nice guy, but yeah, but that was only what was that?

00:20:44.330 --> 00:20:45.726
That was a rock that passed right.

00:20:45.726 --> 00:20:47.046
It wasn't an asteroid or anything.

00:20:47.046 --> 00:20:49.166
It wasn't an asteroid or rock.

00:20:50.061 --> 00:20:51.647
Well, same difference, man yeah whatever.

00:20:53.501 --> 00:20:53.721
I mean.

00:20:53.721 --> 00:20:55.628
You're the fucking astrologist.

00:20:55.628 --> 00:20:58.507
See Tommy O throwing his two cents in there.

00:20:58.507 --> 00:21:00.311
What's it say here?

00:21:00.311 --> 00:21:04.751
We're not scared of viruses anymore, so now they're resorting to the alien invasion.

00:21:04.751 --> 00:21:06.526
You think that's what this is?

00:21:06.961 --> 00:21:07.826
This is phase one.

00:21:08.039 --> 00:21:09.405
I am all down for alien probes.

00:21:09.405 --> 00:21:13.650
I haven't had some play in a while, so let's go Get in man.

00:21:14.740 --> 00:21:15.724
They're doing butt stuff.

00:21:16.859 --> 00:21:32.404
The thought of you running outside with a vat of KY Running around and Tom's next to me with his leather chaps, cowboy hat and fucking in his glitter bag, and we're running through the fucking streets and Big Shot's playing.

00:21:32.404 --> 00:21:34.990
That's it.

00:21:34.990 --> 00:21:41.505
So that's how him and I are going to be superheroes I'm going to run around with fucking suction cup dills and he's running around in leather chaps.

00:21:41.505 --> 00:21:42.984
What's up, grooch?

00:21:42.984 --> 00:21:46.126
So what's your input on this Kev?

00:21:46.126 --> 00:21:48.760
Do you believe the?

00:21:48.882 --> 00:21:49.865
Atlas comet thing.

00:21:49.924 --> 00:21:51.529
Yeah, is it a comet?

00:21:51.529 --> 00:21:53.865
Is it a spaceship?

00:21:56.111 --> 00:21:56.632
Is it a?

00:21:56.632 --> 00:21:57.121
I mean?

00:21:57.121 --> 00:22:01.146
No one can say it's a spaceship, it's a comet, probably.

00:22:02.141 --> 00:22:04.569
How can they not tell it, though, if it's a comet or not?

00:22:04.569 --> 00:22:13.108
And here's my thing, though, because this has been multiple sources where it says it was going like light speed, and then it changed directions.

00:22:14.319 --> 00:22:16.367
Yeah, like it slowed down or something.

00:22:16.640 --> 00:22:22.305
Yeah and it's kind of like Kevin's slider, which is not good.

00:22:22.305 --> 00:22:29.865
So it fucking definitely changed direction light speed in one direction, changes speed and just changes where it's going um.

00:22:29.865 --> 00:22:48.633
Now I mean, it's tough to to really put together any type of fucking idea of what it would be, but the fact that they said it slowed down and changed directions and sped up, I'm sorry I I don't think that can happen in space.

00:22:48.633 --> 00:22:52.248
I mean, from all the movies I've seen, one would think not.

00:22:52.248 --> 00:22:54.432
I don't know.

00:22:54.500 --> 00:22:57.791
Well, objects in space can be affected by other objects in space.

00:22:58.201 --> 00:23:00.169
Here we go, unbelievable.

00:23:02.163 --> 00:23:03.468
I wouldn't read too much into it.

00:23:03.468 --> 00:23:05.924
It's just like gaslighting.

00:23:06.768 --> 00:23:08.424
Should we hey Orbs?

00:23:08.424 --> 00:23:09.528
Can we smoke in the house yet?

00:23:11.626 --> 00:23:12.308
Hey, I'm not there.

00:23:13.528 --> 00:23:15.160
Which corner should we use as the P corner?

00:23:15.160 --> 00:23:19.369
I thought we chose that one.

00:23:20.172 --> 00:23:20.272
No.

00:23:21.364 --> 00:23:24.307
I don't want to ruin the Wine fridge there.

00:23:24.307 --> 00:23:26.626
Can't wait to see you tomorrow.

00:23:26.626 --> 00:23:31.465
You fucking little midget, Is he going to be there tomorrow at the game?

00:23:31.465 --> 00:23:32.167
You should show up.

00:23:32.167 --> 00:23:34.605
I'm not driving all the way over there.

00:23:35.060 --> 00:23:37.048
I mean, come on, just one time.

00:23:37.160 --> 00:23:40.723
I got stuff to do tomorrow, like what, what are you doing at 9 o'clock in the morning?

00:23:40.723 --> 00:23:42.626
See, there's nothing.

00:23:42.626 --> 00:23:43.628
I o'clock in the morning?

00:23:43.628 --> 00:23:44.410
See, there's nothing.

00:23:44.410 --> 00:23:52.190
I got things to do, okay, such as A lot of bad-mouthing going on, by the way, in the dugout about you, about me.

00:23:52.190 --> 00:23:53.531
Yeah, who's bad-mouthing me?

00:23:53.531 --> 00:23:54.032
All of us.

00:23:54.032 --> 00:23:59.305
Oh, fuck you guys.

00:23:59.305 --> 00:24:02.108
Now you know how to get me to show up, dude, every game I'm there.

00:24:02.108 --> 00:24:03.912
Groucho's like where's Matty?

00:24:03.912 --> 00:24:06.174
He ain't coming.

00:24:06.174 --> 00:24:07.256
He's just not coming.

00:24:07.400 --> 00:24:08.464
Well, here's the truth of the matter.

00:24:08.464 --> 00:24:09.744
I'm going to be honest with you.

00:24:09.744 --> 00:24:16.119
It would probably be the most miserable season if you were there, because we suck so bad and me goofing on everyone on top of it.

00:24:16.119 --> 00:24:19.506
If you were on the bench forget about it Somebody would have gotten killed.

00:24:19.506 --> 00:24:21.762
It's been pretty bad.

00:24:21.762 --> 00:24:22.905
Oh, you know what I know.

00:24:22.905 --> 00:24:26.153
Does that guy, scott Conte, go show up anymore?

00:24:26.153 --> 00:24:28.906
He wasn't at the last game I was at.

00:24:28.906 --> 00:24:30.525
I was on that last week's game.

00:24:30.525 --> 00:24:46.346
Oh, okay, because I had to work an event for work, but he's weird, I know, really weird, yeah, so, kev, you want to come up from vacay and come into the game tomorrow and maybe throw like six miles an hour?

00:24:48.922 --> 00:24:50.827
No, I'm starting my drive in the morning.

00:24:50.827 --> 00:24:51.971
I don't think I'll make it.

00:24:52.332 --> 00:24:53.234
Oh, you'll get here by nine.

00:24:53.234 --> 00:24:54.940
It's only up in Newburgh.

00:24:54.940 --> 00:24:57.107
I mean, start your drive a little earlier.

00:24:57.107 --> 00:24:59.586
I mean, take one for the team, for Christ's sake.

00:24:59.586 --> 00:25:06.549
He's more laid back when he's on the phone Than when he's in studio.

00:25:06.549 --> 00:25:11.407
In studio he's just Like vile Venomous.

00:25:11.407 --> 00:25:19.709
One of two things is going on right now Either he's really fucking drunk and he can't like or he got a blowjob?

00:25:19.709 --> 00:25:21.720
No, that's definitely not.

00:25:22.502 --> 00:25:25.227
Don't call sober right now you can tell that was going to be my other comment.

00:25:25.227 --> 00:25:25.669
He's definitely not.

00:25:25.669 --> 00:25:26.251
Don't cold sober right now.

00:25:26.251 --> 00:25:27.740
Well, that was that was going to be my other comment.

00:25:27.740 --> 00:25:29.406
He's definitely not slurring his words.

00:25:29.406 --> 00:25:30.464
No, he's not.

00:25:30.464 --> 00:25:37.125
I was listening to the episode when we did the fucking Gas station food.

00:25:38.894 --> 00:25:39.420
And dude.

00:25:40.041 --> 00:25:41.808
I wanted to punch myself in the face.

00:25:41.808 --> 00:25:50.007
When I spun the wheel and you're like, alright, this is what we're going to do, I was like why don't we just cut both of those in half?

00:25:50.007 --> 00:25:51.029
And I'll no, no, no.

00:25:51.029 --> 00:25:52.884
So you're going to spin.

00:25:52.884 --> 00:25:58.050
And then you just kept on going on in this tangent and it was fucking horrible.

00:25:58.050 --> 00:26:02.250
You're just Matty's just sitting there like get it out, say it, Say it.

00:26:02.250 --> 00:26:04.525
And you just couldn't do it.

00:26:04.525 --> 00:26:09.796
Your thought processing is pretty bad when you're drunk.

00:26:09.880 --> 00:26:13.490
No, Well, hey, that's why I'm seeking help, man.

00:26:17.460 --> 00:26:18.943
Can we send hookers to the Betty Ford Clinic for you?

00:26:18.943 --> 00:26:21.229
Can we talk to one of your vacation mates?

00:26:21.710 --> 00:26:22.792
Yeah, my handlers.

00:26:24.260 --> 00:26:25.442
Is Epstein with you?

00:26:25.442 --> 00:26:28.169
No, juan handlers.

00:26:28.169 --> 00:26:28.730
Is Epstein with you?

00:26:28.730 --> 00:26:29.431
No, juan Epstein, juan Epstein.

00:26:29.451 --> 00:26:30.534
They take me by myself.

00:26:32.161 --> 00:26:35.468
Is there any counselors there that we can discuss your treatment with?

00:26:37.413 --> 00:26:42.069
No, no, unfortunately there's pending litigation, so it's like a sealed file.

00:26:42.290 --> 00:26:43.153
Got you, got you.

00:26:43.153 --> 00:26:44.484
I'm so happy you said that.

00:26:44.484 --> 00:26:44.902
What do you say?

00:26:44.902 --> 00:26:46.347
I was going to tell you, don't put anyone on this phone.

00:26:46.347 --> 00:26:49.410
You guys out there sitting out by the fire pit singing some kumbaya.

00:26:51.119 --> 00:26:52.965
No, we're not allowed open flames.

00:26:52.965 --> 00:26:54.570
I'm surprised.

00:26:55.743 --> 00:26:56.807
What kind of place is this?

00:26:56.807 --> 00:26:57.986
This is fucking ridiculous.

00:26:57.986 --> 00:27:01.711
The money we're paying from the show is a little ridiculous.

00:27:03.221 --> 00:27:04.065
Well, they're pretty thorough.

00:27:05.602 --> 00:27:06.285
Are they nice to you?

00:27:06.285 --> 00:27:07.763
Have they touched you inappropriately?

00:27:10.751 --> 00:27:10.951
No.

00:27:12.342 --> 00:27:13.826
Have they touched you appropriately?

00:27:15.130 --> 00:27:15.289
No.

00:27:16.560 --> 00:27:21.105
Is Jizz Paul with you, because I heard him.

00:27:21.942 --> 00:27:23.183
No, but I do think I heard him.

00:27:24.046 --> 00:27:24.307
Did you?

00:27:25.308 --> 00:27:26.711
I think I heard him down the hall.

00:27:26.711 --> 00:27:30.019
He has a very distinct voice Really.

00:27:31.042 --> 00:27:34.191
Yeah, I think Jizz plays there every day before he washes his hands in the morning.

00:27:34.191 --> 00:27:43.738
Well did you say, man, they keep us locked up like silent little lambs in here, is this what he sings every day in his room?

00:27:45.222 --> 00:27:46.287
Can you hear that?

00:27:46.287 --> 00:27:49.578
I was wondering if you would write some beef with broccoli.

00:27:51.143 --> 00:27:54.432
That's fucking number one on the fucking podcast list right there.

00:27:54.432 --> 00:27:57.430
And then audio and ridiculous downloads.

00:27:57.720 --> 00:27:58.383
Everyone loves it.

00:27:59.045 --> 00:28:00.249
That's the thing, though.

00:28:00.249 --> 00:28:01.826
When that song came out, he hit it big.

00:28:01.826 --> 00:28:07.269
Him and Kevin decided to go out on the town and just get fucking hammered.

00:28:07.269 --> 00:28:08.711
Lo and behold.

00:28:08.711 --> 00:28:21.652
We have to bail both of them out, hence why they're in fucking aa together eight balls and big bar bills, doing bumps and fucking hitting hookers unreal while gunner is behind them, which was a little weird.

00:28:21.652 --> 00:28:25.030
That is a little weird.

00:28:25.030 --> 00:28:29.448
By the way, your dog does look like a meth addict when it's jumping into the pool fetching.

00:28:30.070 --> 00:28:33.884
Yeah, that dog is awesome man.

00:28:35.204 --> 00:28:38.102
Yeah, he's awesome in a fucking In a lab.

00:28:38.102 --> 00:28:45.997
Little weird here with only two dogs here, by the way, it's almost like handleable, yeah.

00:28:45.997 --> 00:28:47.782
By the way, my condolences to Savannah bro.

00:28:49.180 --> 00:28:49.982
Oh man, thanks man.

00:28:50.194 --> 00:28:51.378
Yeah, no, I love that dog.

00:28:51.378 --> 00:28:52.383
That dog was great, savannah was.

00:28:52.383 --> 00:28:53.346
She had some bad breath, but she was a good dog.

00:28:53.346 --> 00:28:54.067
Yeah, it happened in like a flash.

00:28:54.067 --> 00:28:56.055
What happened that dog that dog was great, savannah had some bad breath but she was a good dog.

00:28:56.055 --> 00:28:58.520
It happened in a flash.

00:28:58.520 --> 00:28:59.124
What happened?

00:29:01.198 --> 00:29:02.403
She just didn't eat one night.

00:29:02.403 --> 00:29:06.882
I told Allie and she brought her to the vet the next day.

00:29:06.882 --> 00:29:15.477
About 1.30 that day I got a phone call saying that it was time.

00:29:15.477 --> 00:29:22.161
She had a stomach full of blood and a mess and stuff like that and shit, you know.

00:29:22.161 --> 00:29:28.502
And they're like you could bring her home and bring her back when your husband gets home but she might pass and stuff like that.

00:29:28.502 --> 00:29:40.583
And uh, luckily I was done early, so I got there and you know, you know we did the, did the deed and uh, that fucking sucks I mean kevin hasn't worked a full day in 12 years.

00:29:40.923 --> 00:29:45.401
Thank god you know what.

00:29:45.401 --> 00:29:56.205
You are correct on that, dude, because he he's so fast with what he does and it's just, it's amazing when I pass by and I'm like, look at that, 11.30.

00:29:56.205 --> 00:29:57.648
Truck's gone already.

00:29:57.648 --> 00:30:01.942
If only he carried that over into the real world, god, he could have been amazing.

00:30:01.942 --> 00:30:04.844
Perhaps he does carry it over into parts of the real world.

00:30:04.844 --> 00:30:06.761
That's why the assassin has issues with things.

00:30:06.761 --> 00:30:15.722
You got to be willing to put a full day's work in Kev.

00:30:16.655 --> 00:30:21.605
What's one thing life taught you If you take your top lip and connect it to your bottom lip, you will shut the fuck up.

00:30:21.605 --> 00:30:23.923
Sometimes, shutting the fuck up is the best thing you can do.

00:30:26.016 --> 00:30:27.315
That's a public service message.

00:30:27.315 --> 00:30:32.207
Yeah, that's the advice she gives him every day Anytime he talks.

00:30:32.207 --> 00:30:34.861
But nah, dude, that sucks.

00:30:34.861 --> 00:30:37.683
And I was like how come you didn't do Scout?

00:30:37.683 --> 00:30:39.221
Because I think Scout would have been better.

00:30:39.221 --> 00:30:45.038
You know, we could have kept Savannah Just like.

00:30:45.038 --> 00:30:46.582
Come on, scout, okay.

00:30:46.582 --> 00:30:51.645
Okay, I think he's just going to drop Scout off at the vet's office with a note on it one night.

00:30:51.645 --> 00:30:53.319
Just tie her up to the front door.

00:30:53.319 --> 00:30:54.423
My dog's retarded.

00:30:54.423 --> 00:30:56.961
See what you can do with it.

00:30:56.961 --> 00:30:59.103
Please put this dumb fuck out of its misery.

00:30:59.103 --> 00:31:02.923
Do you guys euthanize retards?

00:31:09.115 --> 00:31:09.978
Speaking of retards.

00:31:09.978 --> 00:31:10.861
I hear her barking.

00:31:11.544 --> 00:31:12.226
Unbelievable.

00:31:12.226 --> 00:31:14.882
Well Kev, it's been a pleasure.

00:31:15.414 --> 00:31:15.977
We love you.

00:31:15.977 --> 00:31:17.642
Yeah, I don't want to get accused of hijacking.

00:31:17.642 --> 00:31:18.444
No, no, no.

00:31:19.839 --> 00:31:22.474
It's good that you, you gotta realize.

00:31:22.474 --> 00:31:23.378
I think it's.

00:31:23.378 --> 00:31:27.605
The 12th step Is realizing the issue and apologizing.

00:31:29.512 --> 00:31:31.161
Yeah, didn't I.

00:31:32.259 --> 00:31:32.740
I don't think so.

00:31:32.740 --> 00:31:33.604
No, I didn't hear you.

00:31:33.604 --> 00:31:34.611
I didn't hear.

00:31:34.611 --> 00:31:35.171
Sorry, I'd like to.

00:31:35.171 --> 00:31:36.164
When you want to do it, we'll be here for you, didn't I?

00:31:36.164 --> 00:31:36.453
I don't think so.

00:31:36.453 --> 00:31:36.769
No, I didn't hear you.

00:31:36.769 --> 00:31:37.098
I didn't hear you.

00:31:37.098 --> 00:31:37.468
Sorry, I'd like to.

00:31:37.468 --> 00:31:42.227
Alright, when you want to do it, we'll be here for you, but you've got to do those hard things.

00:31:42.335 --> 00:31:44.303
I'll prepare a statement for the next show.

00:31:44.303 --> 00:31:47.117
Is she going to have a?

00:31:47.137 --> 00:31:47.701
press release.

00:31:47.701 --> 00:31:51.954
No, we're breaking news.

00:31:51.994 --> 00:31:53.141
We're going to get a CID conference.

00:31:53.894 --> 00:31:55.278
Breaking news to start the next show.

00:31:55.278 --> 00:31:56.221
That's great.

00:31:56.221 --> 00:32:08.682
Kevin's going to come down in a t-shirt and a tie, looking skinnier and unhealthy as ever and slur his way through a statement I can't wear a triple X buddy.

00:32:08.682 --> 00:32:11.708
You know what oh?

00:32:16.336 --> 00:32:17.727
That is, without a doubt, the dumbest thing I've ever heard.

00:32:17.727 --> 00:32:18.714
You are a fucking idiot.

00:32:23.028 --> 00:32:24.251
That's one of the greatest ones ever.

00:32:24.251 --> 00:32:26.383
Well, you enjoy.

00:32:26.383 --> 00:32:28.421
Did you play golf at all this week?

00:32:29.565 --> 00:32:29.724
No.

00:32:31.659 --> 00:32:32.642
What did you do this week?

00:32:34.204 --> 00:32:37.102
You know A little beach, a little this, a little that you know.

00:32:38.095 --> 00:32:39.883
Did you have SPF 1000 on?

00:32:41.516 --> 00:32:42.779
No, no, I don't put anything on.

00:32:42.819 --> 00:32:43.864
Because you're like transparent.

00:32:46.156 --> 00:32:50.564
Yeah, it's funny when I take the old shirt off, though I've got like the farmer tan dude.

00:32:51.756 --> 00:32:54.164
The farmer tan and you look emaciated like Auschwitz.

00:32:54.164 --> 00:32:59.653
Like if you watch a movie on my back it's so white, the farmer tan and you look emaciated like Auschwitz.

00:32:59.653 --> 00:33:02.990
Do you number your ribs?

00:33:02.990 --> 00:33:07.103
No, you look like a patient in Auschwitz.

00:33:07.103 --> 00:33:12.914
Man, fucking, put your shirt back on Christ.

00:33:12.914 --> 00:33:15.560
Maybe the next show we'll hold them down and we'll tattoo a number on them.

00:33:15.560 --> 00:33:16.082
We could do that.

00:33:16.703 --> 00:33:17.746
Jesus Christ.

00:33:17.746 --> 00:33:18.307
No, we could do that.

00:33:19.336 --> 00:33:20.538
We're not talking about anything bad.

00:33:20.538 --> 00:33:21.660
No, what's wrong with you?

00:33:21.660 --> 00:33:25.907
Jesus Love you Orbs.

00:33:25.907 --> 00:33:26.628
Well, you enjoy it.

00:33:26.894 --> 00:33:28.299
Yeah, you guys have a good show.

00:33:28.681 --> 00:33:29.082
We will.

00:33:29.082 --> 00:33:42.385
Thanks, buddy, all right, poor guy Sounds like the whip has been cracking on him.

00:33:42.385 --> 00:33:43.980
Sounds like a beaten man.

00:33:43.980 --> 00:33:45.601
Obzy, get well soon.

00:33:45.601 --> 00:33:52.334
Yeah, buddy, make sure you fucking, you talk about your feelings, you talk to your counselors when need to and you admit your problems.

00:33:52.334 --> 00:33:55.154
What's up, rave Alright.

00:33:55.154 --> 00:34:02.180
And once you do that, then you get the apology out and boom man, you hit that 12 step and next thing you know, we're going to be giving you coins.

00:34:02.180 --> 00:34:04.496
For how many days you've been sober, groots?

00:34:04.496 --> 00:34:05.421
What are you talking about?

00:34:05.421 --> 00:34:07.480
You're not going to the game tomorrow because of Pat.

00:34:07.480 --> 00:34:08.123
Is that what you're saying?

00:34:08.123 --> 00:34:08.684
No, he's going.

00:34:08.684 --> 00:34:09.527
Fuck that, he's going.

00:34:09.527 --> 00:34:17.239
He, the team that hits, from what I see.

00:34:17.239 --> 00:34:17.780
Yeah, it's really weird.

00:34:17.780 --> 00:34:18.804
I've been doing all right this year.

00:34:18.804 --> 00:34:19.106
You have been.

00:34:19.106 --> 00:34:20.150
I've been looking, doing all right.

00:34:20.150 --> 00:34:20.572
I'm not going to lie.

00:34:20.572 --> 00:34:21.094
It's part of the reason.

00:34:21.114 --> 00:34:22.902
Fielding is off this year Totally off.

00:34:22.902 --> 00:34:24.420
I had to catch a whole fucking game.

00:34:24.420 --> 00:34:27.541
Last time I played, I caught nine innings.

00:34:30.476 --> 00:34:31.460
And I walked off the field.

00:34:31.460 --> 00:34:35.693
I'm like never again.

00:34:35.693 --> 00:34:37.865
I'm not even going to lie to you, I'm not going to lie.

00:34:37.865 --> 00:34:40.240
I was back there like fucking Thurman Munson blocking balls.

00:34:40.240 --> 00:34:48.260
I kind of feel like, if I show up at a game like oh Matt, you haven't been here all year, how you doing, put the gear on.

00:34:48.260 --> 00:34:52.641
I could thank Grooch for this because, first of all, we have no pitchers.

00:34:52.641 --> 00:34:57.405
The second, anybody shows up and I see there's only one pitcher.

00:34:57.405 --> 00:35:03.835
I already know what's going on, yeah, but supposedly we have some arms tomorrow and I'm definitely not fucking kidding.

00:35:03.835 --> 00:35:06.342
Well, one guy's got no one because he has the flu.

00:35:06.342 --> 00:35:08.800
I mean fake COVID, yeah, what is that?

00:35:08.920 --> 00:35:09.342
all about.

00:35:09.614 --> 00:35:12.083
I was going to comment but I said I'm just not even getting into it.

00:35:12.083 --> 00:35:12.445
Who has it?

00:35:12.445 --> 00:35:20.155
I don't know.

00:35:20.155 --> 00:35:21.561
They wanted that fucking jerk off from the fucking Mets last year.

00:35:21.561 --> 00:35:22.425
Who was the pitcher?

00:35:22.425 --> 00:35:23.289
And it was a real fucking jerk off.

00:35:23.289 --> 00:35:23.913
Not Adam, I don't mind.

00:35:23.913 --> 00:35:27.664
Adam the lefty, yeah, he wanted to come and fill in tomorrow and shit, all right, so what?

00:35:27.664 --> 00:35:29.159
You're not even there.

00:35:29.159 --> 00:35:30.182
Fuck that guy man.

00:35:30.182 --> 00:35:31.697
You're not even there.

00:35:31.697 --> 00:35:32.418
Why are you getting?

00:35:32.418 --> 00:35:33.539
Like what's up with that?

00:35:33.539 --> 00:35:34.159
I don't know.

00:35:34.159 --> 00:35:38.125
Okay, I'm sorry, you know, but it's so.

00:35:38.125 --> 00:35:41.568
And of course I'm like I don't want to catch and Groucho's like Pat wants to catch.

00:35:41.568 --> 00:35:53.784
Yeah, we got to catch her over here Wouldn't stop until I had to fucking man up and be like all right, I'll believe it.

00:35:53.784 --> 00:35:55.226
But it was okay and I manned up.

00:35:56.409 --> 00:35:56.989
You are a man.

00:35:58.797 --> 00:35:58.978
I try.

00:35:58.978 --> 00:36:01.005
Yeah, it sucked, dude.

00:36:01.005 --> 00:36:01.976
Yeah, I couldn't.

00:36:01.976 --> 00:36:05.606
The next fucking four days I couldn't fucking move.

00:36:05.606 --> 00:36:07.422
I can't afford to do that.

00:36:07.422 --> 00:36:10.360
Well, yeah, of course you can't.

00:36:10.360 --> 00:36:13.740
I mean, dude, I got too much shit to do.

00:36:13.740 --> 00:36:15.516
You'll probably die behind the plate.

00:36:15.516 --> 00:36:16.277
Go fuck yourself.

00:36:16.277 --> 00:36:18.177
I'm just saying you know we worry about your health.

00:36:18.177 --> 00:36:19.539
What about my health?

00:36:19.539 --> 00:36:20.659
What about your fucking health?

00:36:20.659 --> 00:36:28.826
Well, no, no, all right, if I caught nine, I'm golden dude.

00:36:28.826 --> 00:36:31.068
I treat my fucking body like a playground.

00:36:31.748 --> 00:36:32.969
Who chased Conti away?

00:36:32.969 --> 00:36:33.650
Grooch me.

00:36:33.650 --> 00:36:36.612
Oh yeah, you're a loser.

00:36:36.612 --> 00:36:41.378
Well, I don't even think I told him anything at the game.

00:36:41.378 --> 00:36:48.284
No, I think he chased himself away when he asked for the granola bar in right field and then he got rushed away with an ambulance in one game.

00:36:48.284 --> 00:36:49.306
Did you hear about that?

00:36:49.306 --> 00:36:51.202
I didn't realize he got an ambulance.

00:36:51.202 --> 00:37:01.137
Oh, dude, we were at Hopewell, yeah, and Shocker's playing second, uh-huh, and all you hear is anybody got a granola bar.

00:37:01.137 --> 00:37:02.121
I feel like I'm going to throw up.

00:37:02.121 --> 00:37:06.099
Forrest Gump was in right field, it sounded like it, alright.

00:37:06.099 --> 00:37:13.840
So I guess I don't know what the fuck happened and he just had like heat stroke or something.

00:37:14.181 --> 00:37:14.643
Really.

00:37:15.295 --> 00:37:16.943
In like the third or fourth inning.

00:37:16.943 --> 00:37:18.619
Was he drinking?

00:37:18.619 --> 00:37:19.742
I don't think so.

00:37:19.742 --> 00:37:21.938
Well, there's no excuse for that.

00:37:21.938 --> 00:37:29.927
Then I know I was like man up bro Christ, you see my fat ass playing fucking shortstop over here and running around and shitting my pants and stuff.

00:37:29.927 --> 00:37:37.365
I'm not complaining about being hungry because I was starving at the time and somebody actually gave him a granola, which I wanted.

00:37:37.365 --> 00:37:39.268
Oh, oh, what a waste.

00:37:39.268 --> 00:37:41.474
Then If he got taken in the ambulance, he wasted the granola for him.

00:37:41.474 --> 00:37:45.987
So they call fucking Chicago PD, and you know who called him.

00:37:45.987 --> 00:37:47.501
Did he call them himself?

00:37:47.501 --> 00:37:48.878
I think he had them on speed dial.

00:37:48.878 --> 00:37:55.460
Wow, maybe we don't know what's the story on that, because, hey, grouch, what's the story on that?

00:37:55.460 --> 00:37:57.625
Because he hasn't been here since.

00:38:00.190 --> 00:38:00.289
Oh.

00:38:01.157 --> 00:38:05.057
He's very weird, extremely, I realized.

00:38:05.057 --> 00:38:06.903
The other day he unfriended me from Facebook.

00:38:06.903 --> 00:38:08.260
I wasn't upset about it.

00:38:08.260 --> 00:38:12.704
Well, what did you say to him that day?

00:38:12.704 --> 00:38:15.103
I said something in my normal Matty charm You're a loser, go kill yourself.

00:38:15.103 --> 00:38:17.735
I did not say to him that day I said something in my normal Matty charm You're a loser, go kill yourself.

00:38:17.735 --> 00:38:19.701
I did not say that you should do that.

00:38:19.701 --> 00:38:20.463
Jump off a bridge.

00:38:20.463 --> 00:38:23.864
I might tell him to get the fuck away from me or shut the fuck up once or twice.

00:38:24.235 --> 00:38:32.929
Well then, we were playing at fucking Kent and he you played at Kent, yeah, and I didn't go to that game.

00:38:32.929 --> 00:38:37.458
No, kevin showed up with Allie, you know what.

00:38:37.458 --> 00:38:39.317
I was probably in the midst of taking care of my dad.

00:38:39.317 --> 00:38:41.905
I think you were Okay, I think you were.

00:38:41.905 --> 00:38:43.257
I would say that game I would have went to.

00:38:43.317 --> 00:38:50.456
And that was the one when he said I'm not going to be able to make it, I'm back on the toilet, like who?

00:38:50.456 --> 00:38:52.559
Like, listen, you're mid-shit and you're going to text that.

00:38:52.559 --> 00:38:55.643
Just if you're out, you're out.

00:38:55.643 --> 00:38:59.150
I mean, the only person that would make a comment like that, aside from him, is Kinger.

00:38:59.150 --> 00:39:05.492
Listen, if his feelings were hurt, grooch, he doesn't belong on the team because Skin's too thin.

00:39:05.492 --> 00:39:08.704
If you can't take the shit that we dish out.

00:39:09.027 --> 00:39:12.922
I mean, there's times when I shit off myself with some of the stuff Maddie says to me, but I take it.

00:39:12.922 --> 00:39:15.614
It's true, with some of the stuff Maddie says to me, but I take it, it's true, you know, it's true.

00:39:15.614 --> 00:39:18.704
His vagina got hurt and whatever.

00:39:18.704 --> 00:39:26.771
He's just a weird dude, kind of reminds me of a sex trafficker maybe I mean Pat's made me want to drive my car off the Newburgh-Bacon Bridge.

00:39:26.771 --> 00:39:29.682
A couple times on the way I've tried to assist him and he won't do it.

00:39:29.682 --> 00:39:33.824
So he's got tough skin, it's true, in which is true I'm stubborn.

00:39:33.824 --> 00:39:35.947
I'd like to stay and just agitate Pat one more day.

00:39:35.947 --> 00:39:40.199
Yeah, and there was one time we were together agitating each other on the bridge, holding hands together.

00:39:40.539 --> 00:39:42.065
We're going, we're going.

00:39:42.795 --> 00:39:49.458
So we manned up, and if he can't man up, tough shit, we pulled the backdraft.

00:39:49.458 --> 00:39:51.543
Good riddance, you go, I go.

00:39:51.543 --> 00:39:53.367
Oh, look at that.

00:39:53.367 --> 00:40:02.125
Okay, some of you I mean some of you do know so I've been on these dating apps.

00:40:05.619 --> 00:40:05.884
Right.

00:40:06.025 --> 00:40:08.581
So I've been on these fucking dating apps and they're.

00:40:08.581 --> 00:40:18.025
So this is the Mating Game with Patty Flake.

00:40:18.025 --> 00:40:22.085
Let's give you guys an update of what's been going on.

00:40:22.085 --> 00:40:27.324
And I went on the date.

00:40:27.324 --> 00:40:27.565
What?

00:40:27.565 --> 00:40:30.856
Two weeks ago, was it that long already Did you go?

00:40:30.936 --> 00:40:32.603
on one last week, or was it two weeks?

00:40:32.603 --> 00:40:34.114
It's been two weeks, I think right, okay, yeah, all right, which actually went really well.

00:40:34.114 --> 00:40:34.811
I showed you a photo of her yes, very attractive woman, thank you.

00:40:34.811 --> 00:40:35.277
One last week, or was it two weeks?

00:40:35.277 --> 00:40:36.846
It's been two weeks, I think right, yeah, all right, which actually went really well.

00:40:36.846 --> 00:40:39.632
I showed you a photo over yes a very attractive woman.

00:40:39.733 --> 00:40:40.795
Thank you, I was impressed.

00:40:40.795 --> 00:40:41.896
She's a hottie.

00:40:41.896 --> 00:40:45.322
Um, the fact that she liked you blew me away, matt.

00:40:45.322 --> 00:40:49.815
I don't know about you or whoever, but everybody likes me.

00:40:49.815 --> 00:40:50.697
That's not true.

00:40:50.697 --> 00:40:52.858
I just say that to make myself feel better.

00:40:52.858 --> 00:40:56.762
Okay, I only like you like two out of seven days a week.

00:40:56.782 --> 00:41:05.268
So we went to dinner, went to this place called BIA down in Chappaqua Chappaqua Really nice place.

00:41:05.268 --> 00:41:07.130
Oh, really nice place.

00:41:07.130 --> 00:41:08.652
I'm not going to lie Fancy.

00:41:08.652 --> 00:41:10.201
It's got a tablecloth in it.

00:41:10.201 --> 00:41:12.483
It's called like BIA, something like kitchen and bar.

00:41:12.483 --> 00:41:17.202
First of all, it shouldn't be called Kitchen and Bar.

00:41:17.202 --> 00:41:17.706
No, no, it was fucking.

00:41:17.706 --> 00:41:18.793
It was like a real upscale place, really nice.

00:41:18.793 --> 00:41:20.842
Was it like a pizza joint with dirt on the floor?

00:41:20.842 --> 00:41:24.643
We don't talk about that, okay, all right, just checking.

00:41:24.643 --> 00:41:25.105
It's like PTSD.

00:41:25.105 --> 00:41:28.101
So I got a story about that, by the way.

00:41:28.101 --> 00:41:29.485
Great one, excellent.

00:41:29.485 --> 00:41:33.880
Oh, it's the thing.

00:41:34.780 --> 00:41:38.284
The whole dating app thing, the whole dating in your 40s nonsense.

00:41:38.284 --> 00:41:44.271
It is literally a work interview, all right.

00:41:44.271 --> 00:41:49.021
The reason why I say that is this I have a lot of matches.

00:41:49.021 --> 00:41:53.023
Papa Joe said you went on a date with Bea Arthur.

00:41:53.023 --> 00:41:54.206
Fuck you, joe, all right.

00:41:54.206 --> 00:41:55.271
I did not go with Bea Arthur.

00:41:55.271 --> 00:41:56.114
Fuck you, joe.

00:41:56.114 --> 00:41:58.958
All right, I did not go with Bea Arthur, that's fantastic.

00:41:58.978 --> 00:41:59.739
Her name's Phyllis.

00:41:59.739 --> 00:42:01.302
She has an old name.

00:42:01.302 --> 00:42:02.144
She's 40.

00:42:02.144 --> 00:42:04.769
Gorgeous, she's from Riverdale.

00:42:04.769 --> 00:42:10.407
We've been talking every day, so she even talked to you after the date.

00:42:10.407 --> 00:42:13.280
Yeah, dude, we had a really good date.

00:42:13.280 --> 00:42:14.585
I'm impressed.

00:42:14.585 --> 00:42:25.771
I was in awe because she was just very well put together, good head on her shoulders.

00:42:25.771 --> 00:42:29.545
We pretty much talked about everything, laughing, having a great time.

00:42:29.545 --> 00:42:34.867
It's just tough getting time due to the fact of she's a single mom.

00:42:34.867 --> 00:42:43.284
I'm not going to get into the whole pitch of that, but no, it's been good.

00:42:45.675 --> 00:42:51.865
And they're still got these dating apps where I have to answer questions what do you do for a living?

00:42:51.865 --> 00:42:53.318
Does it fucking matter what I do?

00:42:53.318 --> 00:42:55.197
Right now we're trying to figure out.

00:42:55.197 --> 00:42:57.293
Well, they want to make sure you have gainful employment.

00:42:57.293 --> 00:42:59.302
Yeah, so no one wants to date a deadbeat.

00:42:59.302 --> 00:42:59.635
No.

00:42:59.635 --> 00:43:06.722
And they're not liking when I say I am a sex trafficker, so I get blocked all the time.

00:43:06.762 --> 00:43:11.885
For that one, I mean, you should just put a headshot of you with a fedora, with a feather in it.

00:43:11.885 --> 00:43:18.076
I'm a pimp, I feathering.

00:43:18.076 --> 00:43:18.416
I'm a pimp.

00:43:18.416 --> 00:43:18.896
I pimp bitches out.

00:43:18.896 --> 00:43:20.360
I'm a fucking pimp.

00:43:20.360 --> 00:43:22.605
I don't like to date the workforce, so I'm looking for something new.

00:43:22.605 --> 00:43:22.844
I was.

00:43:23.045 --> 00:43:24.829
I was wondering what type of product you have.

00:43:24.829 --> 00:43:27.286
So, are you good?

00:43:27.286 --> 00:43:28.775
Are you good with directions?

00:43:28.775 --> 00:43:33.704
No, we, we like obedience here, you know.

00:43:33.704 --> 00:43:38.878
But, but, and there are, I'm not going to lie, there are.

00:43:38.918 --> 00:43:41.806
Here's one rule I'm going to have for you fucking women out there.

00:43:41.806 --> 00:43:52.322
All right, if you're on the dating apps, the one thing you need to stop fucking doing oh, don't say it Stop putting filters on your photos.

00:43:52.322 --> 00:43:54.521
I don't need to see bubbles.

00:43:54.521 --> 00:43:55.280
I don't need to see horns.

00:43:55.280 --> 00:43:55.806
I don't need to see horns.

00:43:55.806 --> 00:43:58.862
I don't need to see all these stars and twilight shit.

00:43:58.862 --> 00:44:00.079
Like what the fuck?

00:44:00.079 --> 00:44:01.478
You're fat, some of you.

00:44:01.478 --> 00:44:03.536
You're fat and you're putting filters on there and making you look thin.

00:44:03.536 --> 00:44:04.920
It's not helping you out.

00:44:04.920 --> 00:44:14.342
Okay, so the El Natural's out there, the ones who are actually putting up fucking photos of themselves and not fucking up just yeah, you're good.

00:44:14.342 --> 00:44:16.927
The ones with the filters you're making it tough.

00:44:22.155 --> 00:44:25.432
Can you change your profile name to Pat Snuggy Bear Feliciano?

00:44:25.432 --> 00:44:27.338
Because, thank you, bubba Joe, it is.

00:44:27.338 --> 00:44:41.920
You're masking how you really look, all right, and then when you take the filter off, it's like that episode, it's like that scene in fucking Hall Pass Probably the best way to say it.

00:44:41.920 --> 00:44:43.815
No, it's like Shallow Howe, yeah.

00:44:43.815 --> 00:44:45.623
And then you're like oh, wow, she's really hot.

00:44:45.623 --> 00:44:47.161
Why does her eyes look like that?

00:44:47.161 --> 00:44:50.077
Oh, you're on Snapchat taking photos of yourself.

00:44:50.077 --> 00:44:52.581
You know, it's just not good.

00:44:52.581 --> 00:44:54.983
Oh, is that Michelle?

00:44:54.983 --> 00:45:01.650
Yes, yes, listen, it's true.

00:45:01.650 --> 00:45:04.219
Alright, you know, it's true.

00:45:04.219 --> 00:45:07.563
The fact that the filters are going on.

00:45:07.563 --> 00:45:11.250
It shouldn't I can't put a filter on me to make me look like fucking.

00:45:11.250 --> 00:45:11.914
You know what, pat?

00:45:11.914 --> 00:45:16.543
I was just going to say we should put a filter on you to have you have nice, flowing locks of hair.

00:45:16.543 --> 00:45:18.179
Oh my God, could you imagine that?

00:45:18.179 --> 00:45:19.280
That would be fucking great.

00:45:19.280 --> 00:45:22.262
Be like oh my God, your hair is beautiful.

00:45:22.262 --> 00:45:25.744
Actually, anyone who's computer literate, please call in.

00:45:26.295 --> 00:45:27.818
Actually, let me be honest with you.

00:45:27.818 --> 00:45:28.880
That is a filter.

00:45:28.880 --> 00:45:34.974
I'm bald, you know it's just fucking ridiculous.

00:45:34.974 --> 00:45:37.356
You know it's just fucking ridiculous, but it's.

00:45:37.356 --> 00:45:42.942
It is so difficult and so annoying in your 40s to try and date again.

00:45:42.942 --> 00:45:54.911
But what was cool when, when Phyllis and I went on it, it was it felt like going to a bar, chit chat with somebody, getting to know somebody, and that was like the cool aspect.

00:45:56.155 --> 00:45:59.190
It was a good old fashioned get to know you ordered some food, ordered some drinks, did you?

00:45:59.190 --> 00:46:03.681
Did I send you that photo of that fucking uh, the, the uh old-fashioned?

00:46:03.681 --> 00:46:08.208
They made no, oh my god, what bourbon did they use?

00:46:08.208 --> 00:46:12.159
18 old man, 1892, I think it was called.

00:46:12.159 --> 00:46:20.070
Really, yeah, ooh, whiskey infused peaches were inside of it.

00:46:20.070 --> 00:46:23.235
Oh, phenomenal, dude, delicious, absolutely delicious.

00:46:23.335 --> 00:46:36.324
See, I'm used to the old Italian zips Put no peaches in there First of all, you should have a mental pic of me with flowing blonde hair and beautiful locks, because it's glorious and, you know, and funny to look at.

00:46:36.324 --> 00:46:42.746
I want to see if I can get a Fabio wig and just go out with it one day.

00:46:42.746 --> 00:46:56.621
Find out we got to find a Sage Rosenfels wig, I have no idea where it's at Find like a makeup artist so they can do it on my like forehead and shed and make it look like it's real and just walk around with it and see.

00:46:56.621 --> 00:47:06.557
Or you could be just like LaBuddy you fly to Argentina and get some hair plugs, you know or I'll take a photo with my flowing locks and my bitch tits and my man gut and see.

00:47:06.557 --> 00:47:09.385
You know, this is a dad bod, but he's got beautiful hair.

00:47:10.494 --> 00:47:24.824
I mean, I don't know if I'd go as far as say bitch tits, they're close, but the gym's been working on back and the gym's been well, okay, good, good, no, things are good with you know she's at the top of the list out of everybody else.

00:47:24.824 --> 00:47:25.905
That's nice.

00:47:25.905 --> 00:47:31.050
Do you have plans to see her again, trying to, tomorrow, before she goes on vacation on Monday?

00:47:31.050 --> 00:47:33.670
Have you mentioned the podcast yet?

00:47:33.670 --> 00:47:43.675
No, okay, just checking, I know if I want to, I really do the second.

00:47:43.695 --> 00:47:43.876
I do that.

00:47:43.876 --> 00:47:44.920
Bam, no more phone calls and I'm blocked.

00:47:44.920 --> 00:47:45.360
That's it.

00:47:45.360 --> 00:47:47.186
You say faggot too much?

00:47:47.186 --> 00:47:47.748
No, I don't.

00:47:47.748 --> 00:47:50.862
What are you talking about?

00:47:50.862 --> 00:47:53.472
It's fucking retarded to say that.

00:47:53.472 --> 00:47:54.094
That's Matty.

00:47:54.094 --> 00:47:57.682
Michelle, fucking the buddy got here.

00:47:57.682 --> 00:47:59.280
He went down to Brazil or something.

00:47:59.280 --> 00:48:00.282
Argentina, argentina.

00:48:00.282 --> 00:48:03.038
When's the last time you saw Jimmy?

00:48:03.038 --> 00:48:03.960
He got his plugs done.

00:48:03.960 --> 00:48:08.248
Ease her in.

00:48:08.248 --> 00:48:09.561
How am I going to ease her in?

00:48:09.561 --> 00:48:11.619
You could take that in several ways.

00:48:11.619 --> 00:48:14.264
Yeah, I mean Pat.

00:48:14.264 --> 00:48:18.018
Yeah, pat, there's a few ways I could think of Pat Easing her in.

00:48:18.018 --> 00:48:18.981
Oh, there we go.

00:48:18.981 --> 00:48:22.643
You know, very attractive, she was very attractive, very much so.

00:48:22.643 --> 00:48:24.382
Did I tell you that picture in leather pants?

00:48:24.382 --> 00:48:26.481
Yeah, I know it's been a while.

00:48:26.481 --> 00:48:28.041
I know it's been a while.

00:48:28.041 --> 00:48:30.061
It's my body, not yours.

00:48:30.061 --> 00:48:31.996
This I know Probably why my balls have been hurting so bad.

00:48:31.996 --> 00:48:33.780
This, I know that's probably why my balls have been hurting so bad.

00:48:33.780 --> 00:48:36.427
Well, that was the other thing I was going to ask you.

00:48:36.447 --> 00:48:37.469
Yeah, I got to go to the doctor.

00:48:37.795 --> 00:48:38.820
It's kind of concerning.

00:48:38.820 --> 00:48:44.025
Well, if you're fucking smacking off like you're a 14-year-old boy, maybe just ease up.

00:48:44.025 --> 00:48:45.394
Twice a day, bro.

00:48:45.394 --> 00:48:48.860
You make it sound like I'm slapping fucking cowhide.

00:48:48.860 --> 00:48:50.101
Well, not for nothing.

00:48:50.101 --> 00:48:51.023
It's been a while.

00:48:51.023 --> 00:48:52.644
Yeah, you got your place.

00:48:52.644 --> 00:48:54.186
It's not even a fucking word, dude.

00:48:54.186 --> 00:48:55.829
It's probably the biggest drought I've ever been in.

00:48:55.829 --> 00:48:58.862
Yikes, I'm not even going to lie.

00:48:58.862 --> 00:48:59.978
Will I come to Jersey one day?

00:48:59.978 --> 00:49:03.742
No, okay, no, after the story you told me a little while ago.

00:49:04.257 --> 00:49:06.030
You don't have to do that I don't think I want to.

00:49:06.030 --> 00:49:06.715
Whatever?

00:49:07.059 --> 00:49:07.831
Are we going to a?

00:49:07.831 --> 00:49:15.514
Are we going to a, you know, fucking fest Like a white party no, no, no.

00:49:15.514 --> 00:49:18.463
Fest like a white party no, no no, we don't talk about that baby oil involved in this?

00:49:18.485 --> 00:49:23.306
because if so, I'm I you know I may lean towards doing it, that which would be nice.

00:49:23.306 --> 00:49:27.918
I'm just saying no, I mean diddy is getting out, I think so.

00:49:27.918 --> 00:49:29.402
I mean he might.

00:49:29.402 --> 00:49:33.661
He might not have the celebrities his party anymore, but we we could probably get an invite.

00:49:33.661 --> 00:49:42.449
But it will be a scene like the WNBA's been lately, with the fucking dildos getting thrown on the floor, which is absolutely fantastic.

00:49:42.449 --> 00:49:44.510
I can't even imagine why they're complaining about it.

00:49:44.510 --> 00:49:46.739
Those bitches are putting those in their gym bag and going home.

00:49:46.739 --> 00:49:50.661
But some of the memes I've been seeing with that shit.

00:49:50.721 --> 00:49:53.635
Phenomenal, it's absolutely phenomenal, absolutely out of control.

00:49:53.635 --> 00:50:01.740
So the moral of the story is if you're in your 40s and you want to date, don't, okay, well, there's got to be a way.

00:50:01.740 --> 00:50:03.139
It's so.

00:50:03.139 --> 00:50:14.166
The shitty thing is this Like, you can have like matches with people on these sites, right, uh-huh, start having good conversation and then it's just fucking Ghostwriter.

00:50:14.166 --> 00:50:20.599
Well, because they're talking a 47, yeah, I know so.

00:50:20.599 --> 00:50:21.922
Does that make them like like a dating app whore?

00:50:21.922 --> 00:50:23.326
Does it make me a man whore?

00:50:23.326 --> 00:50:24.556
If I'm talking to a lot?

00:50:24.556 --> 00:50:29.606
No, I mean, you got to talk to a bunch of people because it's, it's, it's a numbers game, pat, I'm.

00:50:29.728 --> 00:50:44.507
I'm at the point now where I I'm copying and pasting responses because there's a lot going on, there's so much going on, you know, and it's tough to pay attention to, but it's eased down since dinner two weeks ago.

00:50:44.507 --> 00:50:49.346
But there's some fucking hotties out there who are complete lunatics.

00:50:49.346 --> 00:50:52.061
Well, I was just going to say is it a lunatic fest?

00:50:52.724 --> 00:50:53.065
Oh my.

00:50:53.085 --> 00:50:55.161
God, yeah, there's a reason why they're on.

00:50:55.161 --> 00:50:59.762
That first chick who I connected with and we were supposed to go out for drinks.

00:50:59.762 --> 00:51:06.965
She goes out with her friends one night and next thing, you know, fucking blocks me and everything and I did nothing whatsoever.

00:51:06.965 --> 00:51:11.043
I just think she went out and got some cock and she was like all right, I got to cut everything off.

00:51:11.043 --> 00:51:20.527
And here's the crazy thing she came up as a friend, a suggested friend, on Facebook.

00:51:20.527 --> 00:51:20.807
How was that?

00:51:20.807 --> 00:51:24.692
Maybe she was looking at your profile.

00:51:26.123 --> 00:51:26.829
Maybe that's why she?

00:51:26.849 --> 00:51:30.023
I'm like wait a minute, what do I have on my profile that I'm going to get myself blocked?

00:51:30.023 --> 00:51:31.679
She watched an episode of Take a Deep Show.

00:51:31.679 --> 00:51:36.259
No, no, but it's just.

00:51:36.259 --> 00:51:41.356
My god, the fucking, the shitty mets are actually winning, holy shit.

00:51:41.356 --> 00:51:43.581
Um, it was just.

00:51:43.581 --> 00:51:44.663
It was really weird.

00:51:44.802 --> 00:51:55.460
But I told you the story of when I was talking to her on the phone and like we were on the phone for like two hours and as time went on, I'm like she is fucking hammered.

00:51:55.460 --> 00:51:58.161
And I heard her, you heard her gurgling wine.

00:51:58.161 --> 00:52:00.614
I was like, oh, what are you doing, still having a glass of wine?

00:52:00.614 --> 00:52:03.753
And that kept on going on, but she was gulping.

00:52:03.753 --> 00:52:15.717
Either she was at the glory hole not telling me, or she went through a bottle of wine as fast as possible because she just kept on slurring her words.

00:52:15.717 --> 00:52:24.427
But then she got like upset about something that happened to her and she kept on repeating that over and over and over again.

00:52:24.427 --> 00:52:25.858
So I had flashbacks.

00:52:25.858 --> 00:52:27.684
I was like, wait a minute.

00:52:27.684 --> 00:52:31.947
I was like I just went through this shit, not happening, not happening.

00:52:31.947 --> 00:52:35.518
But oh, to dovetail that.

00:52:36.338 --> 00:52:39.342
So my ops manager, nicole, she was surprised.

00:52:39.342 --> 00:52:40.623
She's like you do a podcast.

00:52:40.623 --> 00:52:42.606
I'm like, yeah, she's like give it to me.

00:52:42.606 --> 00:52:43.706
So I was sent it to her.

00:52:43.706 --> 00:52:44.208
She was listening.

00:52:44.208 --> 00:52:45.289
She's like absolutely love it.

00:52:45.289 --> 00:52:46.990
She's like I'm going to tell everybody if I can listen to it.

00:52:46.990 --> 00:52:49.478
And her and I are sitting there talking.

00:52:49.478 --> 00:52:50.418
I didn't even know she was.

00:52:50.418 --> 00:52:53.485
So I was like Get the fuck out of here.

00:52:53.485 --> 00:52:54.347
How old is she?

00:52:54.347 --> 00:52:58.784
She graduated in oh, oh god, 05.

00:52:58.784 --> 00:52:59.425
She's a child.

00:52:59.425 --> 00:53:00.190
Alright, go ahead.

00:53:00.190 --> 00:53:02.277
No, she's yeah, what was that?

00:53:02.277 --> 00:53:04.003
10 years, 9 years?

00:53:04.356 --> 00:53:09.295
10 years after me, so she's in her late 30s and Her sisters Went to Carmel and everything.

00:53:09.295 --> 00:53:14.237
And then we're sitting there talking and she's like, oh, yeah, she's like my sister worked at Gabby's for years.

00:53:14.237 --> 00:53:17.442
I was like, say again, I was like who's your sister?

00:53:17.442 --> 00:53:18.922
Who might that be?

00:53:18.922 --> 00:53:23.869
So she tells me I was like, oh, I was like, well, my ex is the manager at Gabby's.

00:53:23.869 --> 00:53:24.610
She's like oh, what's your name?

00:53:24.610 --> 00:53:32.117
So I tell her she texts her sister Two minutes later oh, her, she's a crackhead.

00:53:32.117 --> 00:53:35.786
I was going to say cunt, but crackhead works too.

00:53:38.413 --> 00:53:45.494
The second I heard that I just felt so much relief off my shoulders and then I was like I was like you guys want to see something even crazier.

00:53:45.494 --> 00:53:54.461
So I compared a photo of the getting caught in action and five years ago oh boy, you want me to show it to you?

00:53:54.461 --> 00:53:55.606
Can I see your reaction to it?

00:53:55.606 --> 00:53:56.369
Absolutely, this is going to be great.

00:53:56.369 --> 00:53:56.449
Ago.

00:53:56.449 --> 00:53:57.192
Oh boy, you want me to show it to you?

00:53:57.192 --> 00:53:57.813
Can I see your reaction to it?

00:53:57.813 --> 00:54:00.469
Absolutely, this is going to be great.

00:54:00.469 --> 00:54:06.242
So I caught the ex coming out of the hotel yeah, sucking meth dick, oh boy.

00:54:06.242 --> 00:54:20.047
And so I caught the action photo and I sent it to the dude's wife, which actually I got a text message by the way Stop Last week on TikTok Uh-huh, on tiktok uh-huh.

00:54:20.047 --> 00:54:21.077
You want to hear what it says?

00:54:21.297 --> 00:54:23.204
I sure do this is great, this is great.

00:54:23.344 --> 00:54:25.637
I laughed so hard, meant a lot.

00:54:25.637 --> 00:54:27.762
Okay, there we go all right.

00:54:27.762 --> 00:54:29.387
Um, where is it?

00:54:29.387 --> 00:54:35.958
Uh-oh, did you lose it?

00:54:35.958 --> 00:54:38.425
She totally like wow, what a cunt.

00:54:38.425 --> 00:54:45.228
So and I'll read the responses I gave thereafter, which are great.

00:54:45.228 --> 00:54:49.663
So it says this is on August 10th at 4.39 pm.

00:54:49.663 --> 00:54:50.324
What day is that?

00:54:50.324 --> 00:54:51.706
August 10th?

00:54:51.927 --> 00:54:52.228
Yeah.

00:54:53.356 --> 00:54:55.202
So 12 days ago on the 10th.

00:54:55.342 --> 00:54:56.385
Oh, it's a Sunday.

00:54:56.385 --> 00:54:58.541
Oh, it's a quick Sunday message.

00:54:58.541 --> 00:55:02.900
So it says you need to stop Stop messaging people.

00:55:02.900 --> 00:55:03.943
You don't know.

00:55:03.943 --> 00:55:04.766
We are over.

00:55:04.766 --> 00:55:07.414
I was like what are you talking about?

00:55:07.414 --> 00:55:09.983
I haven't said a word or done anything to anyone.

00:55:09.983 --> 00:55:11.521
I was like I know, we're over.

00:55:11.521 --> 00:55:15.126
You're the one who cheated with a fucking meth addict.

00:55:15.126 --> 00:55:18.367
Her response Seriously Just know, we're over, you're the one, you're the one who cheated with a fucking meth addict.

00:55:18.367 --> 00:55:20.048
Her response seriously, just stop.

00:55:20.048 --> 00:55:23.230
I was like seriously, take responsibility for your actions.

00:55:23.230 --> 00:55:25.851
Have no reason to waste a fucking breath on you.

00:55:25.851 --> 00:55:27.472
Why you did this, not me?

00:55:27.472 --> 00:55:28.393
Why start now?

00:55:28.393 --> 00:55:29.072
Correct?

00:55:29.072 --> 00:55:32.981
Oh, it is a response to that.

00:55:33.663 --> 00:55:35.324
I I added more to it.

00:55:35.324 --> 00:55:37.969
Okay, I was like I hope he's fucking worth it.

00:55:37.969 --> 00:55:43.056
You'll still be a fucking alcoholic with no license and I'm the one who didn't get my life together.

00:55:43.056 --> 00:55:44.701
Question mark, question mark, question mark.

00:55:44.701 --> 00:55:45.322
How dare you?

00:55:45.322 --> 00:55:50.219
Next thing would love to know who I messaged.

00:55:50.219 --> 00:55:53.344
Unlike you, I don't hide behind lies, don't?

00:55:53.344 --> 00:55:59.516
Next text Real winner you picked.

00:55:59.516 --> 00:56:00.177
You're still going.

00:56:00.177 --> 00:56:01.318
Yeah, I had to get it out.

00:56:01.318 --> 00:56:08.766
I was like oh, you're upset because I got a hold of his wife Laughing my ass off.

00:56:08.766 --> 00:56:10.088
Good, you deserve.

00:56:10.088 --> 00:56:15.197
Every fucking bit of it Shows how much of a liar you two are.

00:56:15.197 --> 00:56:18.702
Karma's a bitch and you'll get every bit of it because of how much you fucked me over.

00:56:18.702 --> 00:56:29.063
You're not even worth the energy, your loss definitely not mine Laughing my fucking ass off and blocked, and that's how we left it.

00:56:29.063 --> 00:56:32.179
So I was like I guess she didn't like my responses, so now I'm totally blocked.

00:56:32.842 --> 00:56:41.085
But that being said, look at this fucking before and after.

00:56:41.085 --> 00:56:42.447
Where is it?

00:56:42.447 --> 00:56:42.889
Here we go.

00:56:42.889 --> 00:56:54.449
So, oh, by the way, here's a photo of her, completely passed out, pissing the couch.

00:56:54.449 --> 00:56:56.094
Sorry, here's a photo of her, completely passed out, pissing the couch.

00:56:56.094 --> 00:57:02.860
Sorry, gotta get it out, bro, gotta get it out.

00:57:02.860 --> 00:57:04.822
So, anyway, here we go.

00:57:04.822 --> 00:57:06.824
You want the before or you want the after?

00:57:06.824 --> 00:57:08.326
First, let's do the after.

00:57:08.326 --> 00:57:09.146
No, give me the before.

00:57:09.146 --> 00:57:10.827
No, let's do the after.

00:57:10.827 --> 00:57:14.931
So this is action photo Coming out the hotel Caught.

00:57:14.931 --> 00:57:18.186
Ah, all right.

00:57:18.186 --> 00:57:18.791
That out the hotel Caught?

00:57:18.791 --> 00:57:19.052
Ah, all right.

00:57:19.052 --> 00:57:19.514
That's not good.

00:57:19.514 --> 00:57:23.766
That's her right.

00:57:23.766 --> 00:57:26.121
How old does she?

00:57:26.141 --> 00:57:26.583
look Old dude.

00:57:26.603 --> 00:57:27.284
Okay, that's not good.

00:57:27.284 --> 00:57:36.489
All right, this is from six years ago, okay.

00:57:39.800 --> 00:57:40.001
Right.

00:57:42.931 --> 00:57:43.875
Is that the same person?

00:57:43.875 --> 00:57:48.675
That's six years, six years Not the same person, right?

00:57:48.675 --> 00:57:49.398
No?

00:57:49.398 --> 00:57:58.639
So, lo and behold, more and more stuff's coming out and I believe she's like a huge drug addict now.

00:57:58.639 --> 00:58:02.538
It certainly looks that way A little bit, yeah, good that way A little bit, yeah.

00:58:02.538 --> 00:58:02.998
Good for her.

00:58:02.998 --> 00:58:03.599
Good for her.

00:58:03.599 --> 00:58:07.199
Hey, listen, she just has to call Uber now because she's got no driver.

00:58:07.559 --> 00:58:08.061
Whatever?

00:58:08.590 --> 00:58:11.637
So listen, I'm happy, Things are good.

00:58:11.637 --> 00:58:16.958
When Did you see what fucking Kevin wrote?

00:58:17.391 --> 00:58:17.471
R.

00:58:17.512 --> 00:58:18.333
Kelly the couch?

00:58:18.333 --> 00:58:24.746
Yes, several times, Kevin, and he's got a picture what?

00:58:24.746 --> 00:58:26.686
I don't see the photo.

00:58:26.706 --> 00:58:29.436
Oh, oh, oh boy.

00:58:29.496 --> 00:58:31.490
Oh boy, all right.

00:58:31.490 --> 00:58:38.264
So the great thing about it was I remember my brother and my sister was like you got it, andy, you got it.

00:58:38.264 --> 00:58:42.510
I was caught in six years ago of the person she was to.

00:58:42.510 --> 00:58:47.298
Then when I saw him and her together, it just clicked.

00:58:47.298 --> 00:58:56.637
I started I wasn't even angry, dude, I started laughing and I was like, oh my god, you look like the crypt keeper.

00:58:56.637 --> 00:58:59.842
That was it.

00:58:59.842 --> 00:59:01.204
Fucking.

00:59:01.204 --> 00:59:04.117
Sleep better, no anxiety anymore.

00:59:04.659 --> 00:59:15.077
Lo and behold, few days after that Cause that was going on, for whatever Her and I were broken up, for whatever long, I was like I was thinking about doing the dating app.

00:59:15.077 --> 00:59:18.635
So I'm like no, I'm not fucking wasting my time Not doing it.

00:59:18.635 --> 00:59:19.914
And I did it.

00:59:19.914 --> 00:59:24.697
So I actually did a facebook fucking dating, which is that one's weird.

00:59:24.697 --> 00:59:25.559
That sounds scary.

00:59:25.559 --> 00:59:42.961
Uh, you get a lot of the ones in the city who who are russian, who are looking for yugoslavian I don't know, looking for daddy ukraine and um solinsky's cousin yeah, pretty much, I think he was on there With his dick on the piano.

00:59:42.961 --> 00:59:46.092
Oh, um, so I'm sitting there.

00:59:46.092 --> 00:59:47.476
Next thing I get an alert that I got a like.

00:59:47.476 --> 00:59:49.380
I'm like oh Okay, what is?

00:59:49.380 --> 00:59:49.762
What is that?

00:59:51.054 --> 00:59:54.197
Kevin wrote Gollum Precious.

00:59:54.197 --> 01:00:01.679
It totally, dude, totally it's, and it's you know what On all series it's sad to see, it really is, it's shocking.

01:00:01.679 --> 01:00:03.898
She was a beautiful person.

01:00:03.898 --> 01:00:14.420
You see her now and it's like, wow, I'm on an episode of Cops, like I'm not lying to you, like I goof and I like to laugh at those memes.

01:00:14.420 --> 01:00:20.699
You know, when they showed the mug shots of the crackheads and the meth heads, I said you know what they?

01:00:20.699 --> 01:00:23.204
I said what they were three years ago versus now.

01:00:23.204 --> 01:00:27.853
Yeah, how big is the difference of that.

01:00:28.094 --> 01:00:29.795
It's fucking bad, insane dude.

01:00:29.795 --> 01:00:35.661
This is the first time knowing the person seeing that is fucking bad man, absolutely insane.

01:00:35.661 --> 01:00:41.266
And the saddest part is her daughters have to deal with that shit.

01:00:41.266 --> 01:00:53.125
I love her daughters to death, but the fact that they're trying to, they begged her to get help and she chooses the pipe and some meth, dick and alcohol.

01:00:53.125 --> 01:00:56.556
I cannot wait until that place burns down.

01:00:56.556 --> 01:01:02.057
I would love it, just like oh yeah, I would go over with a huge bag of marshmallows, you and I.

01:01:02.057 --> 01:01:06.038
Oh I, I can't even go in there and get a fucking slice of pizza.

01:01:06.038 --> 01:01:06.822
I refuse.

01:01:06.922 --> 01:01:09.436
No, it's just it's the black hole.

01:01:09.637 --> 01:01:09.817
Yeah.

01:01:10.371 --> 01:01:12.215
The local yokel white trash of caramel.

01:01:12.215 --> 01:01:17.146
Yep, hang out there, I know so, and there's rats the size of fucking cats in there.

01:01:17.146 --> 01:01:18.472
Ugh, just so you know.

01:01:18.472 --> 01:01:21.179
Health department Check it out.

01:01:21.179 --> 01:01:22.521
I've already called them several times.

01:01:22.521 --> 01:01:27.815
But you know what?

01:01:27.815 --> 01:01:29.112
I got a guy that you know.

01:01:29.112 --> 01:01:33.514
If we want I got a guy we can send him over that way and you know, things happen at restaurants.

01:01:33.514 --> 01:01:34.619
Is this the rooster killer?

01:01:34.619 --> 01:01:36.114
I'm just saying I got a guy.

01:01:36.114 --> 01:01:38.097
I just want to know if this is the rooster killer.

01:01:38.097 --> 01:01:43.641
He hasn't shown up to my fucking place yet, because I got chickens and roosters all over the place pecking on my fucking door.

01:01:43.641 --> 01:01:45.384
I need to.

01:01:45.384 --> 01:01:48.157
First of all, he said he had a plan, but he never showed up.

01:01:49.570 --> 01:01:51.016
Well, that sounds like somebody I know.

01:01:51.376 --> 01:01:53.335
Yep, yep, guy needs some help.

01:01:53.335 --> 01:01:58.041
So my nephew is the one who convinced me.

01:01:58.041 --> 01:02:01.132
Him and Ryder are the two that convinced me.

01:02:01.132 --> 01:02:03.715
They're like you need to be happy, just do it.

01:02:03.715 --> 01:02:05.336
I was like it's a headache, bro.

01:02:05.336 --> 01:02:07.659
I was like you know, women, they're crazy, crazy.

01:02:07.659 --> 01:02:08.900
Well, you got to find one.

01:02:08.900 --> 01:02:09.922
That's not crazy.

01:02:09.922 --> 01:02:12.664
You don't have a good track record with that, but you could try.

01:02:12.664 --> 01:02:18.275
Yeah, it's like I'm fucking like a magnet for fucking psychos and and you got to learn to cut the cord earlier.

01:02:18.275 --> 01:02:19.838
Yeah, it's like.

01:02:19.938 --> 01:02:22.503
My thing is like once I see a red flag, skadoodles.

01:02:22.503 --> 01:02:23.063
Well, that's it.

01:02:23.063 --> 01:02:26.219
You ain't got time for the nonsense anymore, skadoodles, and that's it.

01:02:26.219 --> 01:02:27.835
So I was like you know what?

01:02:27.835 --> 01:02:28.679
Fuck it, let me do it.

01:02:28.679 --> 01:02:45.014
So I created a Facebook dating app Right, which is really weird, fucking really weird and trying to create a bio.

01:02:45.014 --> 01:02:45.836
I'm a single father, that's it.

01:02:45.836 --> 01:02:49.884
You know it's, and I don't, because I haven't fucking been dating God knows how long.

01:02:49.884 --> 01:02:55.668
I was like all right, chat GBT, can you create me?

01:02:55.668 --> 01:02:56.291
Chat, gbt is my boy.

01:02:56.291 --> 01:02:57.657
Listen, I give you all the credit in the world.

01:02:57.657 --> 01:03:03.320
When I was a youngster and I moved to fucking Pennsylvania by myself and I didn't know nobody out there or anything.

01:03:03.320 --> 01:03:13.981
I kept looking at some of the fucking you know, some of the fucking aol sites and shit at aol at the time yeah, when it was free right, yes, okay, I was looking and I'm like I just can't fucking do it.

01:03:14.143 --> 01:03:18.114
I just I can't, I couldn't fucking put myself out there, couldn't do it.

01:03:18.114 --> 01:03:27.315
So I felt like a vulnerable child doing this, right, I was like this is going to suck, and going through it probably two days.

01:03:27.315 --> 01:03:34.213
In next thing I get a notice that somebody liked my boonch and it was Chick Phyllis.

01:03:34.213 --> 01:03:37.800
I was like, hmm, all right, I was like oh, boogie down All right From the Bronx, okay Okay.

01:03:37.840 --> 01:03:40.623
And liked, oh, boogie, down, all right From the Bronx, okay Okay.

01:03:40.623 --> 01:03:42.467
And liked Boom, started talking.

01:03:42.467 --> 01:03:43.795
We fucking hit it off.

01:03:43.795 --> 01:03:48.559
Pretty much like so much shit in common.

01:03:48.559 --> 01:03:56.981
Same things we're looking for what we want Her pass with her ex and everything was just crazy.

01:03:56.981 --> 01:03:58.876
You're looking for 12-inch pipe too.

01:03:58.876 --> 01:04:02.474
I'm on the wrong site, whoops.

01:04:02.474 --> 01:04:20.458
So I switched to browsers, got off grinder, but no, like she was like so straightforward and honest with like everything, like with everything that she's going through and what you know what shit that's happened to her, and I was like that takes fucking balls to do that.

01:04:20.458 --> 01:04:22.356
I was like wait a minute, let me test this.

01:04:22.356 --> 01:04:23.862
Like I was like that takes fucking balls to do that.

01:04:23.882 --> 01:04:24.885
I was like wait a minute, let me test this.

01:04:24.925 --> 01:04:26.048
I was like are she crazy for saying that?

01:04:26.048 --> 01:04:27.394
God, I was like I don't know if I'm being fucking.

01:04:27.394 --> 01:04:29.563
Could you send me a close-up picture of your eyes?

01:04:29.563 --> 01:04:31.273
I gotta look at the crazy factor.

01:04:31.273 --> 01:04:34.059
Quick question I'm gonna need a picture of the vagine.

01:04:34.059 --> 01:04:36.853
It's the only way you can tell if if you're crazy or not.

01:04:36.853 --> 01:04:42.164
But no, um, and her and I hit it off, asked her out to dinner.

01:04:42.164 --> 01:04:47.034
We go to dinner and it was fucking great, had a great time, but it's, that was what.

01:04:47.034 --> 01:04:48.059
Two weeks.

01:04:48.059 --> 01:04:50.677
We haven't seen each other since, but we've been talking to each other every day.

01:04:50.677 --> 01:04:55.735
Okay, and it's cool.

01:04:55.735 --> 01:04:56.599
That's awesome.

01:04:56.599 --> 01:04:57.393
So far, so good.

01:04:57.393 --> 01:04:59.393
Good luck, yeah, you know.

01:04:59.393 --> 01:05:04.782
Fingers crossed, so hopefully I get to see her tomorrow, tomorrow's Friday, tomorrow's Saturday right, tomorrow's Saturday yeah.

01:05:04.869 --> 01:05:06.255
So she's going on vacation.

01:05:06.255 --> 01:05:11.460
She's going on a cruise with her daughter on Monday, so you're going to catch nine innings tomorrow and limp into the date tomorrow, I'm not.

01:05:11.460 --> 01:05:15.012
First of all, stop throwing in the nine inning catching.

01:05:15.012 --> 01:05:20.416
Ask for a meds list up front.

01:05:20.416 --> 01:05:22.338
Wow, you know what, kev?

01:05:22.338 --> 01:05:24.860
That is a very, very good question.

01:05:24.860 --> 01:05:25.521
That is.

01:05:25.581 --> 01:05:26.442
That's not terrible.

01:05:26.442 --> 01:05:28.663
Listen, you can't get mad at me for asking that.

01:05:28.663 --> 01:05:30.445
Nope, nope, can't.

01:05:30.445 --> 01:05:32.686
I hate to ask, but what kind of meds are you on?

01:05:32.686 --> 01:05:34.108
Quick question Are you on?

01:05:34.108 --> 01:05:37.697
Have you been depressed or anxious?

01:05:37.697 --> 01:05:38.855
Are you on meds for it?

01:05:38.855 --> 01:05:43.713
Are we on Zoloft or Prozac?

01:05:43.713 --> 01:05:49.210
Because you seem like your eyes are sagging a little in the middle of the day Just wondering, and you seem like you really parched for water all the time.

01:05:49.210 --> 01:05:50.153
Are you on lithium?

01:05:51.137 --> 01:05:52.581
I'm just wondering, oh boy.

01:05:53.911 --> 01:05:58.335
No, but she does have multiple sclerosis, not crazy.

01:05:58.335 --> 01:06:01.197
Bad Listen, you can work around that.

01:06:01.197 --> 01:06:03.677
She's like like you won't even notice it.

01:06:03.677 --> 01:06:07.860
I'm like now you're going to make me look, why'd you give me something?

01:06:07.880 --> 01:06:08.844
else to look for.

01:06:09.416 --> 01:06:10.449
We meet up at the restaurant.

01:06:10.449 --> 01:06:12.637
Fuck, why couldn't you just say you had a lazy eye?

01:06:12.637 --> 01:06:20.074
I don't know if I could deal with a lazy eye, because I'd be sitting there like what are you looking at, you know?

01:06:20.074 --> 01:06:21.532
So I meet up with her Dude.

01:06:21.532 --> 01:06:22.525
I was first time in my deal with a lazy eye because I'd be sitting there like what are you looking at, you know?

01:06:22.525 --> 01:06:23.478
But uh, so I meet up with her at the dude.

01:06:23.478 --> 01:06:26.322
I was first time in my like long, long time.

01:06:26.322 --> 01:06:28.585
I was nervous as fuck.

01:06:28.585 --> 01:06:31.519
I was like I'm hope I'm not being catfished.

01:06:31.519 --> 01:06:43.806
I really hope I'm not showing up and some dude gets out of a car with a wig on, has an Adam's apple Hi, I'm Phyllis, like something like that.

01:06:43.806 --> 01:06:46.699
That is fucking phenomenal.

01:06:46.699 --> 01:06:48.394
But I got to get on these dating sites.

01:06:49.077 --> 01:06:49.458
No, you don't.

01:06:49.789 --> 01:06:52.219
First of all, you got to pay for them and they're fucking expensive.

01:06:52.219 --> 01:07:09.036
So she got to the restaurant early because it's when we had that fucking, that huge, fucking storm two weeks ago on a Wednesday, yep, and I was driving down on the sawmill Thank God I had my truck dude Fucking cars were off the road.

01:07:09.115 --> 01:07:09.478
Oh yeah.

01:07:09.809 --> 01:07:11.998
I'm blowing through fucking puddles.

01:07:11.998 --> 01:07:14.137
Well, people don't know how to fucking drive, man.

01:07:14.137 --> 01:07:15.436
It's fucking awful.

01:07:15.436 --> 01:07:17.594
So we meet up.

01:07:17.594 --> 01:07:21.172
She's there, I get there, I get out.

01:07:21.172 --> 01:07:23.219
She's driving a fucking BMW M4.

01:07:23.219 --> 01:07:25.036
It's fucking ridiculous.

01:07:25.036 --> 01:07:28.697
She gets out of the car, dude, my fucking jaw drops.

01:07:28.697 --> 01:07:29.398
What's her job?

01:07:29.398 --> 01:07:35.422
She owns four pharmacies down in the Bronx.

01:07:35.422 --> 01:07:40.492
So she's a drug dealer.

01:07:40.492 --> 01:07:43.701
No, she's partnered up with a couple other people.

01:07:43.701 --> 01:07:51.090
Uh huh, she does all the scheduling, she does all the hiring and she runs four pharmacies.

01:07:51.090 --> 01:07:52.958
Four pharmacies, really, yeah.

01:07:54.494 --> 01:07:57.302
See if you can get me the insurance.

01:07:57.302 --> 01:08:00.860
I spoke to her about that.

01:08:00.860 --> 01:08:06.500
Really A few bucks in it for you I got a couple I got a couple people who already called her about her.

01:08:06.500 --> 01:08:13.199
Uh um, like a financial advisor called her, who was in my network group because she was talking about it.

01:08:13.239 --> 01:08:14.130
I'm like I know somebody.

01:08:14.130 --> 01:08:17.036
I got a guy so I had them reach out and she was happy about that.

01:08:17.036 --> 01:08:21.302
Then I had somebody else reach out to her for her.

01:08:21.302 --> 01:08:26.000
What the fuck was it for, I forget.

01:08:26.000 --> 01:08:27.936
But they reached out and she texted me.

01:08:27.936 --> 01:08:30.337
She's like you're just helping me out every which way.

01:08:30.337 --> 01:08:31.594
I was like, yeah, that's who.

01:08:31.594 --> 01:08:33.921
I am Way too ridiculous.

01:08:33.921 --> 01:08:36.814
I don't want to say inappropriate things.

01:08:36.814 --> 01:08:42.095
Help me, Help me, help you.

01:08:42.095 --> 01:08:47.217
Okay, but she gets out and she gives me a kiss.

01:08:47.217 --> 01:08:56.621
When she got out of the car and there was just like this instant connection, A little electricity, Totally dude Like, and I haven't felt like that in fucking forever.

01:08:56.621 --> 01:08:58.317
That's pretty fucking cool dude.

01:08:58.317 --> 01:09:09.158
So we go inside, we're just sitting there shooting the shit and have a great conversation, a couple drinks, order some food, and we were there for about three hours or so just chilling.

01:09:09.158 --> 01:09:10.041
Good night Grooch.

01:09:10.041 --> 01:09:13.569
Hey Grooch, make sure you get your binky, okay, buddy?

01:09:13.569 --> 01:09:14.694
Why don't you suck your thumb tonight?

01:09:14.694 --> 01:09:17.177
Get a couple fucking hits tomorrow, you piece of shit.

01:09:17.289 --> 01:09:18.475
I'll see you in the morning, you little bitch.

01:09:18.475 --> 01:09:26.770
But yeah, it was real cool.

01:09:26.770 --> 01:09:31.356
There was times like we were fucking laughing for God knows how long because it was just like some of the awkward shit I was I can't imagine.

01:09:31.356 --> 01:09:36.502
And I told her I'm like, listen, I do like and create awkward situations.

01:09:36.502 --> 01:09:37.875
So she's like, oh, that's okay.

01:09:37.875 --> 01:09:42.730
I was like you don't want to say that it's okay now.

01:09:42.730 --> 01:09:44.716
I was like you don't want to say that, yeah, it's okay now.

01:09:44.716 --> 01:09:46.420
I don't know if it's going to be okay.

01:09:46.439 --> 01:09:51.404
Oh, yeah, sorry, democrat or Republican, I don't even think we even talk politics.

01:09:51.404 --> 01:10:03.614
Interesting, actually, I believe she's conservative, okay, and I think she leans towards Towards Trump, just cause of I'm just curious.

01:10:03.614 --> 01:10:04.557
I'm just curious.

01:10:04.557 --> 01:10:07.796
Yeah, no, I don't even think we talked about politics.

01:10:07.796 --> 01:10:22.274
We talked about everything else Her family, my family, the, the fact that, like, she's extremely family oriented, which I absolutely love about people, and then, when I was talking about my family, how close knit we became After my mom passed.

01:10:22.274 --> 01:10:24.297
What is her?

01:10:24.297 --> 01:10:26.684
Is she Italian?

01:10:26.684 --> 01:10:28.916
No, turkish.

01:10:28.916 --> 01:10:31.060
I was just going to say she's got to be Greek.

01:10:31.060 --> 01:10:33.516
Oh, oh, my god.

01:10:34.175 --> 01:10:35.262
And she has a little accent.

01:10:35.887 --> 01:10:38.418
Oh my god, oh it.

01:10:38.418 --> 01:10:40.791
That was like just Beyond sexy.

01:10:40.791 --> 01:10:42.872
And I just sat there like Dude I usually interrupt people when they're talking.

01:10:42.872 --> 01:10:43.292
Oh my God, oh it, it.

01:10:43.292 --> 01:10:43.934
That was like just beyond sexy.

01:10:43.934 --> 01:10:46.515
And I just sat there like dude, like I usually interrupt people when they're talking.

01:10:46.515 --> 01:10:48.137
I just sat there and listened.

01:10:48.137 --> 01:10:57.305
Say that again, one, one more time, say that word again oh, it's so nice, but uh, no, she's fucking, she's cool shit.

01:10:57.527 --> 01:10:57.806
Nice.

01:10:58.511 --> 01:11:01.921
And she's cool as shit, nice and yeah so, and, by the way, the dating apps.

01:11:01.921 --> 01:11:04.997
You want me to give you prices on the dating apps?

01:11:04.997 --> 01:11:07.695
No, you want to get your mind blown?

01:11:07.695 --> 01:11:12.292
No, you will, because I'm going to tell you so.

01:11:12.292 --> 01:11:13.497
I was on like 42 of them.

01:11:13.497 --> 01:11:19.420
I spent 7,000 last month on dating apps.

01:11:19.420 --> 01:11:21.556
Seriously, I feel like it's OnlyFans, but it's not.

01:11:21.556 --> 01:11:22.570
So you have.

01:11:22.570 --> 01:11:24.135
First of all, one of them is Hinge.

01:11:24.135 --> 01:11:26.280
All right, yep, hinge is a big one.

01:11:26.280 --> 01:11:28.737
Hinge is all right.

01:11:28.737 --> 01:11:31.990
Let's see Hinge Now.

01:11:31.990 --> 01:11:34.980
Did you go on all of these or you just explored the prices?

01:11:34.980 --> 01:11:35.972
I went on all of them.

01:11:36.475 --> 01:11:37.650
Okay, so tell me the price.

01:11:37.650 --> 01:11:38.353
I Okay, tell me the price.

01:11:38.672 --> 01:11:40.997
I did shout over 100 bucks on these apps.

01:11:40.997 --> 01:11:43.643
All right, give me the price and tell me what the result was.

01:11:43.643 --> 01:11:49.072
Okay, it's pretty easy.

01:11:49.072 --> 01:11:50.934
And isn't it nice without Kevin here interrupting.

01:11:50.934 --> 01:11:52.355
Yeah, dude, this is great.

01:11:52.355 --> 01:11:54.177
We should fire him.

01:11:54.177 --> 01:11:57.523
Just saying, maybe just put him in a penalty box, all right.

01:11:57.542 --> 01:12:01.070
So Hinge X if I upgrade Uh-huh, all right.

01:12:01.070 --> 01:12:07.641
So HingeX, if I upgrade Jesus Christ for three months, $100.

01:12:07.641 --> 01:12:09.673
Here's where.

01:12:09.673 --> 01:12:10.850
But here's a or.

01:12:10.850 --> 01:12:11.835
You can fast track it.

01:12:11.835 --> 01:12:17.413
You do one week, see how many matches you get.

01:12:17.413 --> 01:12:19.471
I want to jump on for a week and see how many.

01:12:19.471 --> 01:12:21.396
One week $25.

01:12:21.396 --> 01:12:23.462
All right, that's Hinge.

01:12:25.853 --> 01:12:26.896
And how did you do on Hinge?

01:12:26.896 --> 01:12:27.653
You want to know what?

01:12:27.653 --> 01:12:29.791
Hinge reminds me of 2K.

01:12:29.791 --> 01:12:30.914
You want to know why?

01:12:30.914 --> 01:12:36.658
Because you got to buy little fucking microtransactions to send people roses.

01:12:36.658 --> 01:12:38.868
Oh, once you get in, you got to spend money on shit.

01:12:38.868 --> 01:12:43.295
These cocksuckers, dude, fuck that Insane.

01:12:43.295 --> 01:12:50.430
I mean I'm still on it, but there's certain things you can't do.

01:12:50.430 --> 01:12:54.847
And then there's Bumble, Bumble, bumble.

01:12:54.847 --> 01:12:57.153
Oh, somebody responded to me.

01:12:57.153 --> 01:12:59.556
I'm a school social worker from the students with autism.

01:12:59.556 --> 01:13:02.582
Oh, boy, this year she works with the kids.

01:13:02.582 --> 01:13:03.123
I got to touch it.

01:13:03.123 --> 01:13:03.344
He is.

01:13:03.344 --> 01:13:11.658
I'll also have a classroom of where is that Typical but traumatized kids.

01:13:11.658 --> 01:13:13.823
Oh boy, run, yeah, run.

01:13:13.823 --> 01:13:14.931
Teacher schedule.

01:13:14.931 --> 01:13:16.516
So I really can't complain.

01:13:16.516 --> 01:13:19.256
Red flag oh, love that teacher schedule.

01:13:19.256 --> 01:13:26.682
Red flag she's like 10 miles from me, uh-huh, uh-huh, there you go, there you go.

01:13:26.682 --> 01:13:28.935
Okay, she's pretty cute too.

01:13:31.390 --> 01:13:31.851
I mean she.

01:13:33.537 --> 01:13:37.028
Oh yeah, oh, you know, it does help.

01:13:37.429 --> 01:13:37.689
All right.

01:13:39.231 --> 01:13:40.493
They like the big guy.

01:13:40.493 --> 01:13:41.253
You know what Pat.

01:13:41.253 --> 01:13:44.177
She's used to dealing with kids, with issues, so she can deal with you.

01:13:44.177 --> 01:13:47.542
I'm sure I could be on the spectrum Absolutely, if she wants me to.

01:13:47.542 --> 01:13:49.904
I mean, you act like you have a touchy-to-ism from time to time.

01:13:49.904 --> 01:13:53.034
Totally do, dude, it's contagious, totally contagious.

01:13:53.034 --> 01:13:56.350
So Bumble, yep, here's Bumble.

01:13:56.350 --> 01:14:00.038
Okay, explore premium Alright, fucking premium.

01:14:00.420 --> 01:14:07.817
So what you get with premium is you get a thing called spotlight, so your profile is seen more by everybody else.

01:14:07.817 --> 01:14:15.198
And then you get super swipes, swiper no, swiping, I'm not paying.

01:14:15.198 --> 01:14:17.271
How much is this?

01:14:17.271 --> 01:14:17.653
It is, let's see.

01:14:17.653 --> 01:14:19.296
Here's the problem with it.

01:14:19.296 --> 01:14:21.560
It is, let's see.

01:14:21.560 --> 01:14:22.442
I can't even.

01:14:22.442 --> 01:14:23.564
Here's the problem with it.

01:14:23.564 --> 01:14:25.256
It won't tell you until you sign up.

01:14:25.256 --> 01:14:27.939
It won't even tell me who fucking liked me.

01:14:27.939 --> 01:14:31.279
It'll just show blurred photos, right?

01:14:31.279 --> 01:14:33.313
So then it says see who likes you.

01:14:33.313 --> 01:14:39.443
Click on, motherfucker, I'm trying to.

01:14:39.443 --> 01:14:47.631
Oh, so God, they block you.

01:14:47.631 --> 01:14:48.552
Real bad, jesus christ, that's crazy.

01:14:48.552 --> 01:14:49.113
Sorry, let's see.

01:14:49.113 --> 01:14:49.796
Let's try this again.

01:14:50.797 --> 01:14:55.922
Bubba joe wants to know if you were matched with any of, uh, anyone you know, or any of your friends from facebook.

01:14:55.922 --> 01:14:57.307
No, on facebook.

01:14:57.307 --> 01:14:58.411
Here's the thing how it works.

01:14:58.411 --> 01:15:05.264
None of whoever you're friends, they will not know that you're doing it.

01:15:05.264 --> 01:15:07.837
Oh, they purpose, they purpose.

01:15:07.837 --> 01:15:10.859
So, whoever you're friends with, they're already fucking blocked off.

01:15:10.859 --> 01:15:18.238
But then, like, if it gives you like this, this, like, crush something, so if you have a like, you could say you have a crush on somebody.

01:15:18.238 --> 01:15:22.292
It's fucking stupid, by the way, and you're limited.

01:15:22.292 --> 01:15:25.298
You're limited to the amount of likes per day.

01:15:25.298 --> 01:15:30.216
Huh, so I'm going through, I'm like nope, yes, nope, yes, nope, yes, nope, yes.

01:15:30.216 --> 01:15:31.480
Oh, I've reached my limit, fuck.

01:15:31.480 --> 01:15:33.051
So I've got to wait 24 hours.

01:15:33.051 --> 01:15:35.333
Oh, which is crazy.

01:15:35.333 --> 01:15:36.454
It's a little nutty.

01:15:36.454 --> 01:15:47.105
All right, it's a little nutty, but what you do is, if you guys do match or like each other, you have the option to share your profile.

01:15:48.590 --> 01:15:49.872
Ah All right.

01:15:49.872 --> 01:15:59.640
And what's crazy is I remember before I even matched with Phyllis, this girl from Mayapac matched with me first.

01:15:59.640 --> 01:16:01.761
Uh-huh, we were talking.

01:16:01.761 --> 01:16:03.542
She gives me her number, like right away.

01:16:03.542 --> 01:16:12.957
I was like, hmm, but stunning, absolutely stunning, and she wanted to go for drinks, right, yeah.

01:16:12.957 --> 01:16:15.042
So I was like, cool, let's set a date.

01:16:15.042 --> 01:16:23.545
Then nothing again, because she asked 17 guys if they wanted to go for a date.

01:16:23.545 --> 01:16:24.365
No, you want to know why?

01:16:24.365 --> 01:16:32.417
Because this dummy, we're friends with each other on Facebook now, oh, and every day she puts up things where she's alone.

01:16:32.417 --> 01:16:36.618
So stupid.

01:16:36.618 --> 01:16:39.171
So let me see if I can find her.

01:16:39.171 --> 01:16:40.435
Oh, there she is.

01:16:40.435 --> 01:16:47.039
This chick's hot, too Gorgeous, uh huh, uh huh.

01:16:47.039 --> 01:16:55.644
So, oh, but you can see.

01:16:55.644 --> 01:16:57.409
You can see the fucking crazy in the eye.

01:16:57.470 --> 01:17:00.095
Yeah, you can just tell it's almost like the face of the Joker.

01:17:00.095 --> 01:17:00.952
Very attractive, very attractive of crazy in the eye.

01:17:00.952 --> 01:17:01.756
Yeah, you can just tell it's almost like the, the face of the joker.

01:17:01.756 --> 01:17:03.716
Very attractive, oh my gosh, very attractive.

01:17:03.716 --> 01:17:07.603
Yeah, look at the eyes, man it's.

01:17:07.603 --> 01:17:11.434
It's no good, but that doesn't look psycho, or does it?

01:17:11.554 --> 01:17:14.300
oh, it does yeah, yeah, is it because of the flowing hair?

01:17:14.300 --> 01:17:19.395
Oh no, god, like look at that, yeah, but like I don't know.

01:17:19.395 --> 01:17:21.479
So anything, you see it's.

01:17:21.479 --> 01:17:28.064
It's always saying something about being lonely and whatnot oh yeah when you look I'm like then get off the fucking.

01:17:28.225 --> 01:17:33.402
When you get off the shit, when you look like you're a fucking psychopath, either shit or get off the pot.

01:17:33.402 --> 01:17:38.398
So, bumble, by the way, is uh, let's see.

01:17:38.398 --> 01:17:42.085
Okay, I don't even know how to fucking figure out the pricing here.

01:17:42.085 --> 01:17:47.337
For whatever reason, it won't.

01:17:47.337 --> 01:17:49.756
Let me Stop punching your phone.

01:17:49.756 --> 01:17:51.275
I think it blocked me or something.

01:17:51.275 --> 01:17:55.278
It won't, let me fucking.

01:17:55.278 --> 01:17:57.948
Let's do that.

01:17:57.948 --> 01:17:58.189
All right.

01:17:58.210 --> 01:18:00.036
So which app have you had the most success on?

01:18:00.036 --> 01:18:00.818
Facebook?

01:18:00.818 --> 01:18:03.552
Facebook, people respond.

01:18:03.552 --> 01:18:04.015
Interesting.

01:18:04.015 --> 01:18:04.984
Facebook, people respond.

01:18:04.984 --> 01:18:05.670
People respond.

01:18:05.670 --> 01:18:06.997
You know.

01:18:06.997 --> 01:18:10.020
The other ones are just.

01:18:10.020 --> 01:18:11.756
I honestly think they're all bots.

01:18:11.756 --> 01:18:28.012
To be honest with you, bumble, I've had a few interactions With people, hinge, couple on there and then it's like you put your preferences in Distance.

01:18:28.012 --> 01:18:30.856
What they want, height, age.

01:18:30.856 --> 01:18:38.130
Do some of these profiles Crazy, like they show on Facebook when they show the profile?

01:18:38.130 --> 01:18:40.449
Yeah, this is why I complain about the fucking filters.

01:18:40.449 --> 01:18:41.574
Stop with the filters.

01:18:41.574 --> 01:18:44.650
Well, no, not even the filters.

01:18:44.650 --> 01:18:51.917
Mother of six looking for stable man from being positive role model for my children, bro, you want to know what's crazy?

01:18:51.917 --> 01:18:54.279
There was a fucking chick on there one day.

01:18:54.560 --> 01:18:55.000
Oh, boy, and.

01:18:55.020 --> 01:18:58.804
I'm looking and she said she has one kid.

01:18:58.804 --> 01:19:01.865
Then she's like I'm expecting my second in January.

01:19:01.865 --> 01:19:06.829
No, what, what?

01:19:06.829 --> 01:19:07.692
No, oh my God.

01:19:07.692 --> 01:19:09.636
Then I'm thinking I'm like maybe that could be hot.

01:19:09.636 --> 01:19:15.018
You know, they get a little frisky during the third trimester.

01:19:16.912 --> 01:19:17.675
But it's nuts man.

01:19:18.711 --> 01:19:20.314
But it's always the same fucking question.

01:19:20.314 --> 01:19:21.949
You introduce yourself, but it's always the same fucking question.

01:19:21.949 --> 01:19:25.597
Like you know, you introduce yourself and it's always the same question first.

01:19:25.597 --> 01:19:26.921
So what are you looking for?

01:19:26.921 --> 01:19:28.891
I'm looking for.

01:19:28.891 --> 01:19:37.579
I was wondering if I can get a load of women and put them in a container and I was going to ship them over to fucking Yugoslavia.

01:19:37.579 --> 01:19:39.051
That's what I'm looking for.

01:19:39.832 --> 01:19:40.434
Are you into that?

01:19:40.434 --> 01:19:44.780
I'd love to start with a blowjob and if it's good, we could go on from there.

01:19:44.780 --> 01:19:46.444
Are you into facial Fridays?

01:19:46.444 --> 01:19:50.430
Yes or no?

01:19:50.430 --> 01:19:52.537
And it's Boy, you better give all of us that information.

01:19:52.537 --> 01:19:55.515
Not for 10 million, I'll tell you that.

01:19:55.515 --> 01:19:59.372
Well, not for you, not for you, but it's.

01:19:59.372 --> 01:20:01.338
I'm going to be.

01:20:01.359 --> 01:20:01.500
Like.

01:20:01.500 --> 01:20:03.796
There's some fucking you women out there.

01:20:03.796 --> 01:20:06.009
Some of you are Fucking crazy.

01:20:06.009 --> 01:20:08.510
I don't know what's going on with the guy side.

01:20:08.510 --> 01:20:09.155
I don't.

01:20:09.155 --> 01:20:12.779
I'm just fucking up front and like I don't give a shit, whatever.

01:20:12.779 --> 01:20:15.655
Plain and simple, you know.

01:20:15.655 --> 01:20:16.814
So what?

01:20:16.814 --> 01:20:20.257
I dated a meth addict for a while, got out of it, we're good.

01:20:20.257 --> 01:20:23.850
I gotta imagine some of the guys on there are fucking crazy.

01:20:23.850 --> 01:20:25.195
Oh, they're probably creeps.

01:20:25.813 --> 01:20:28.034
The good thing about the Facebook one Creeps are crackheads.

01:20:28.034 --> 01:20:35.719
Yeah, you cannot send photos until either you share profiles or exchange numbers.

01:20:35.719 --> 01:20:39.564
Oh, interesting, that's it.

01:20:39.564 --> 01:20:41.046
So what are you doing today?

01:20:41.046 --> 01:20:42.314
Any plans for the weekend?

01:20:42.314 --> 01:20:45.757
Cool, it's like the same shit over and over again.

01:20:45.757 --> 01:20:54.938
Now the difference with Phyllis and everybody else she was just fucking direct upfront what she went through, what she's looking for.

01:20:54.938 --> 01:20:56.713
I ain't got time for nonsense.

01:20:56.713 --> 01:20:57.475
Here's where we're at.

01:20:57.475 --> 01:20:59.561
Yeah, that's cool, that was it.

01:20:59.561 --> 01:21:00.953
I was like cool, cool, cool.

01:21:00.953 --> 01:21:06.877
Yeah, all right, by the way, your ass is it looked like it.

01:21:06.877 --> 01:21:10.752
Oh my God, it was like a peach Beautiful, it was fucking.

01:21:10.752 --> 01:21:12.260
I might have to take.

01:21:12.260 --> 01:21:14.409
You might have to show me a picture in the leather pants one more time.

01:21:14.409 --> 01:21:15.530
I could show that to you right now.

01:21:15.530 --> 01:21:17.632
Oh, what's this?

01:21:17.632 --> 01:21:23.979
Gotta remember after the Spank Bank, who's Morgan Morgan sent you a message in Facebook dating.

01:21:24.680 --> 01:21:26.161
This is what I'm talking about, is it Dave?

01:21:28.823 --> 01:21:36.787
Oh, morgan aka Rave, I'm not answering that, dave, stop trying to date.

01:21:36.807 --> 01:21:38.798
Pat, who is it?

01:21:39.591 --> 01:21:42.078
Who is Morgan Share?

01:21:42.078 --> 01:21:46.716
We have breaking news.

01:21:46.716 --> 01:21:48.381
I could just tell by the smile it's fake.

01:21:50.372 --> 01:21:53.261
Let's see, no, good you know, no, no good Blonde.

01:21:53.850 --> 01:21:58.976
I don't remember the last time I was with a blonde, matty, you know what I used to be all about the blondes.

01:21:58.976 --> 01:22:02.573
It was all blonde all the time and I got away from it.

01:22:02.573 --> 01:22:06.779
Now I'm a brunette guy now, so you had blonde Orientals when I could.

01:22:06.779 --> 01:22:12.519
Oh, he's so big, oh, I love you.

01:22:13.489 --> 01:22:14.514
Oh, I love you a long time.

01:22:14.514 --> 01:22:15.819
They call me Blondie.

01:22:15.819 --> 01:22:19.738
If I forward you something, can you play it on the air?

01:22:19.738 --> 01:22:31.596
Yeah yeah, this chick's from Torrenton, connecticut, 5'10" God damn Long legs, wrap me up in that like a little pretzel.

01:22:31.596 --> 01:22:36.060
She smokes occasionally, doesn't have.

01:22:36.060 --> 01:22:37.456
Well, she doesn't have kids.

01:22:37.456 --> 01:22:38.949
She's 43 and doesn't have kids.

01:22:38.949 --> 01:22:39.975
That means something.

01:22:39.975 --> 01:22:41.962
Hmm, she's 43 and doesn't have kids.

01:22:41.962 --> 01:22:42.485
That means something.

01:22:42.485 --> 01:22:44.493
Hmm, she's a.

01:22:44.493 --> 01:22:48.873
Oh no, she only has a high school diploma.

01:22:48.873 --> 01:22:51.018
Yeah, that should be the problem.

01:22:51.037 --> 01:22:53.542
Bro, See, this is the Look at this.

01:22:53.542 --> 01:22:56.296
It says drinking often.

01:22:56.296 --> 01:23:04.050
Oh, it says smoking occasionally, that little martini glass Often.

01:23:04.050 --> 01:23:07.140
Sure, I'll go from an alcoholic to another one.

01:23:07.140 --> 01:23:09.761
Maybe she likes to drink, pat, I drink often.

01:23:09.761 --> 01:23:10.789
I'm not an alcoholic.

01:23:10.789 --> 01:23:12.858
Then I'll admit to.

01:23:12.858 --> 01:23:15.338
That's what Kevin said and you know where he's at.

01:23:15.338 --> 01:23:17.609
I just forwarded you something.

01:23:17.609 --> 01:23:20.139
I think you should search this woman out.

01:23:20.139 --> 01:23:26.213
How's the battery running low On what On the computer?

01:23:26.213 --> 01:23:28.921
Did it unplug?

01:23:28.921 --> 01:23:33.893
Oh, we're good.

01:23:33.893 --> 01:23:38.279
Okay, there we go, all right.

01:23:38.279 --> 01:23:39.561
What is this Crisis?

01:23:39.561 --> 01:23:41.873
Averted All right so am I playing this?

01:23:42.837 --> 01:23:45.332
Yeah, protect this woman at all costs.

01:23:45.332 --> 01:23:47.036
Alright, let's see why.

01:23:47.036 --> 01:23:52.994
Telling you this, you have to search this woman out.

01:23:52.994 --> 01:23:54.957
She's your next wife.

01:23:54.957 --> 01:23:59.193
I can't do it, claude.

01:23:59.233 --> 01:24:03.238
Hemmers, you can't bang a guy more than six inches.

01:24:04.371 --> 01:24:07.713
No, my shit too tight and too little, like I can't do it.

01:24:07.713 --> 01:24:09.219
Claude Hammers.

01:24:10.171 --> 01:24:11.435
So it has to be minimum six inches.

01:24:11.435 --> 01:24:13.292
Yes, so you like little dicks?

01:24:13.292 --> 01:24:15.439
Yes, are you lying, though?

01:24:15.439 --> 01:24:16.280
No, I'm not lying.

01:24:16.280 --> 01:24:18.015
So if he has a four inch, you'll do it.

01:24:18.015 --> 01:24:19.990
Yeah, three inches.

01:24:20.091 --> 01:24:20.792
Yeah.

01:24:20.811 --> 01:24:21.472
That's a lie.

01:24:21.573 --> 01:24:22.134
No, it's not.

01:24:22.594 --> 01:24:23.695
Now what's the minimum for the small?

01:24:24.296 --> 01:24:27.000
Two I must go to America to protect her.

01:24:27.000 --> 01:24:31.024
Okay, now Not everybody's the same down there Like my shit little.

01:24:31.085 --> 01:24:33.252
Dude, she's gorgeous, my shit tight.

01:24:33.252 --> 01:24:34.240
Wait, watch his turn.

01:24:34.350 --> 01:24:36.091
No, I don't like that.

01:24:36.091 --> 01:24:39.694
And Dinosaur extra big like that's not for me.

01:24:39.734 --> 01:24:41.796
So the guys that have little dicks, they have a chance with this.

01:24:41.796 --> 01:24:43.217
Yes, give a little spin again.

01:24:44.118 --> 01:24:46.140
Come on now.

01:24:46.140 --> 01:24:47.400
Oh, smoke show.

01:24:47.400 --> 01:24:50.884
Just give me three and a half minutes, maybe four.

01:24:51.224 --> 01:24:51.645
My man.

01:24:51.645 --> 01:24:54.686
So if you have a little dick, she wants you.

01:24:54.686 --> 01:25:00.912
Yes, hey, do you like?

01:25:00.931 --> 01:25:01.432
doing anal.

01:25:01.432 --> 01:25:03.136
Get out of here.

01:25:03.136 --> 01:25:05.561
Yes or no, it's got to be smaller than six.

01:25:05.561 --> 01:25:09.253
Most of you do.

01:25:09.253 --> 01:25:11.878
That's the girl you take home to mom after the first date.

01:25:11.878 --> 01:25:13.141
I'm such an asshole.

01:25:13.141 --> 01:25:14.083
I sent that to my son.

01:25:14.083 --> 01:25:19.636
I said you're going to find this woman, bring her home to me please.

01:25:21.949 --> 01:25:24.592
Well, I couldn't say that, oh my God.

01:25:25.332 --> 01:25:28.877
Well, who would fucking put that on their profile?

01:25:28.877 --> 01:25:29.938
They drink often.

01:25:29.938 --> 01:25:31.680
Someone who's honest.

01:25:31.680 --> 01:25:32.600
Maybe she likes.

01:25:32.600 --> 01:25:33.220
Is she young?

01:25:33.220 --> 01:25:35.082
Does she like to go out 43.

01:25:35.082 --> 01:25:37.164
She's not young.

01:25:37.164 --> 01:25:38.987
High school diploma, all right.

01:25:38.987 --> 01:25:39.931
She's spiritual.

01:25:39.931 --> 01:25:42.189
Yeah, she's probably always asking fucking God for help or something.

01:25:42.872 --> 01:25:46.115
Or she's saying oh God a lot, but she doesn't have kids at 43.

01:25:47.420 --> 01:25:49.890
Red flag, that's kind of a.

01:25:49.890 --> 01:25:55.338
I just I don't kind of an oh.

01:25:55.338 --> 01:26:02.600
Then I went out for drinks with this other chick last week Uh-huh, I haven't heard this story.

01:26:02.600 --> 01:26:09.958
Regretted it 10 minutes in oh no, oh, my god, it's not able to carry a conversation.

01:26:09.958 --> 01:26:11.581
I anytime.

01:26:11.581 --> 01:26:20.079
I talked okay, okay, okay, uh-huh, okay, okay, and I almost was like shut the fuck up, just shut up.

01:26:20.079 --> 01:26:25.717
Blonde Brunette, oh, and gorgeous figure.

01:26:25.717 --> 01:26:30.859
Uh-huh, I was staring, I'm not going to lie.

01:26:30.859 --> 01:26:32.243
Was she offended?

01:26:32.243 --> 01:26:34.497
She said can you keep your eyes up?

01:26:34.497 --> 01:26:36.170
I'm like I just looked.

01:26:36.170 --> 01:26:37.515
Oh, fuck you.

01:26:37.515 --> 01:26:38.876
I was like I just looked.

01:26:38.876 --> 01:26:41.135
She's like you've been looking at me.

01:26:41.135 --> 01:26:45.180
I was like I just looked for she's like you've been looking at me.

01:26:45.180 --> 01:26:46.689
I was like I'm sorry, you're wearing a tight pink dress.

01:26:46.689 --> 01:26:49.310
I'm like, first of all, you're wearing a tight neon pink dress.

01:26:49.310 --> 01:26:50.358
What else am I supposed to look at?

01:26:50.358 --> 01:26:51.909
You should have thought about that before you came out.

01:26:53.875 --> 01:26:58.652
So we wasted 80 bucks on drinks and so we're leaving.

01:26:58.652 --> 01:27:05.757
We're outside talking and I was just trying to position myself because we were in the parking lot and I'm like she's like, why are you moving so much?

01:27:05.757 --> 01:27:08.739
I'm like I didn't want to fucking get hit by the car first of all.

01:27:08.739 --> 01:27:10.822
Oh, you drove her there.

01:27:10.822 --> 01:27:11.342
No, no, no.

01:27:11.342 --> 01:27:16.627
I met her there and then she went in to give me a hug and I put my hands on her hips.

01:27:16.627 --> 01:27:18.613
Oh, no, oh no, she lost her mind.

01:27:18.613 --> 01:27:22.082
Really, I can't believe you touched me.

01:27:22.082 --> 01:27:23.496
I was like, where did I touch you?

01:27:23.496 --> 01:27:26.563
I was like, is that not your hips?

01:27:26.563 --> 01:27:27.390
I was like I apologize.

01:27:27.390 --> 01:27:28.829
I was like I'm sorry if you feel offended.

01:27:28.829 --> 01:27:31.037
I was like now I see why you're single.

01:27:31.037 --> 01:27:32.716
Bye, bye.

01:27:32.716 --> 01:27:36.295
I fucking walked to my truck and walked off and I fucking blocked her.

01:27:37.368 --> 01:27:40.376
Wow, un-fucking-believable dude, what a twat.

01:27:40.376 --> 01:27:43.417
It's like looking at Tom Oser it's very hard to keep your eyes up.

01:27:43.417 --> 01:27:49.796
Yeah, definitely, especially because of his hog, I mean when he walks around in those assless chaps, you know.

01:27:49.796 --> 01:27:52.274
And it was Like I was.

01:27:52.274 --> 01:28:01.039
We were just sitting there talking and just Okay, okay, okay, okay, like that was her contribution to the conversation.

01:28:01.039 --> 01:28:01.862
Oh, my God.

01:28:01.862 --> 01:28:05.859
Well, she, just she wasn't even divorced yet.

01:28:05.859 --> 01:28:09.835
Oh, red flag too.

01:28:09.835 --> 01:28:12.738
Then she's like she never got married.

01:28:12.738 --> 01:28:13.801
But I just stayed together with him.

01:28:13.801 --> 01:28:19.577
I was like what, For what, dude, people are crazy.

01:28:19.577 --> 01:28:22.417
And then all like next, you know, red flag here.

01:28:22.417 --> 01:28:29.909
Fucking referee came across the fucking room, he threw another flag and I was like I got to get the fuck out of here and I'm sitting there.

01:28:29.909 --> 01:28:31.935
I'm like I got to be the nice guy and pay for this shit.

01:28:31.935 --> 01:28:35.203
Fucking waste, unbelievable.

01:28:35.203 --> 01:28:36.712
What'd she have to drink?

01:28:36.712 --> 01:28:40.462
That's a good question.

01:28:40.462 --> 01:28:42.833
Oh, it was fucking sangria.

01:28:42.833 --> 01:28:45.341
I was like, oh yeah, look at that.

01:28:45.341 --> 01:28:51.122
Fucking fermented, fucking grapes and cunts unbelievable, you know.

01:28:51.162 --> 01:28:53.297
So, you, you women out there, let me tell you something.

01:28:53.297 --> 01:28:54.930
I'm going to give you a little tidbit of information.

01:28:54.930 --> 01:29:00.319
If you're looking to date, be fucking, you know, just don't be an asshole.

01:29:00.319 --> 01:29:02.662
Stop interrupting when somebody's in.

01:29:02.662 --> 01:29:07.256
Just the, the, okay shit and motherfuckers.

01:29:07.256 --> 01:29:10.805
Be honest, that's it, just be honest.

01:29:10.805 --> 01:29:13.193
Uh, you know, I'm out there fucking putting myself.

01:29:13.193 --> 01:29:17.451
I'm very vulnerable and I don't, you know, I don't like being vulnerable, especially with the ghosts.

01:29:17.451 --> 01:29:18.734
You know this.

01:29:18.734 --> 01:29:21.439
But it's.

01:29:21.439 --> 01:29:31.118
You sit there, you chit-chat for a while, you kind of get the background of somebody and you know where they're coming from and you pull shit like that eat a dick.

01:29:31.118 --> 01:29:33.414
Matter of fact, take it deep.

01:29:33.414 --> 01:29:39.514
Okay, hey-o, and that's the way we're going to end the show tonight Boom yeah, good old mating game.

01:29:39.514 --> 01:29:39.594
Way.

01:29:39.594 --> 01:29:43.009
We're going to end the show tonight Boom yeah, good old, the mating game.

01:29:43.009 --> 01:29:53.625
So hopefully things continue with the number one selection Tune in next week for another edition of the mating game.

01:29:53.886 --> 01:29:55.997
There's probably going to be no addition to the mating game.

01:29:55.997 --> 01:29:59.877
Hopefully I'll be like I went on a second date Great.

01:29:59.877 --> 01:30:02.095
Hopefully there's no nightmare after that.

01:30:02.095 --> 01:30:03.140
Kevin will be back next week.

01:30:03.140 --> 01:30:05.018
Hopefully we get to the mating game segment.

01:30:05.018 --> 01:30:08.420
I thought insurance is covered in 90 days at AA.

01:30:08.420 --> 01:30:11.256
Are we firing him for three months?

01:30:11.256 --> 01:30:12.159
I think we should fire him.

01:30:12.159 --> 01:30:16.916
The show's running a lot smoother and there's no interrupt.

01:30:16.916 --> 01:30:20.296
You guys talk all day.

01:30:20.296 --> 01:30:22.613
Now you're making him a stuttering prick.

01:30:22.613 --> 01:30:23.775
So what if she drinks a lot?

01:30:23.775 --> 01:30:25.600
You know.

01:30:26.362 --> 01:30:26.762
Yikes.

01:30:29.131 --> 01:30:35.875
But you women out there, if some dirtbag broke your heart doesn't mean the next guy's going to be an asshole.

01:30:35.875 --> 01:30:36.979
Play it straight.

01:30:38.333 --> 01:30:42.796
Yes there's a lot of guys out there that are assholes, but there's a lot of guys out there who are nice guys, plain and simple.

01:30:42.796 --> 01:30:47.860
And if you're going to be a fucking cunt, stay off the sites.

01:30:47.860 --> 01:30:55.935
Yeah, yeah, definitely stay off the fucking sites because they're way too expensive and ain't no one got time for your shit.

01:30:55.935 --> 01:30:58.948
Moral of the story is don't give any of those sites your fucking debit card.

01:30:58.948 --> 01:31:06.417
The story is don't give any of those sites your fucking debit card, okay, because they don't tell you when it's renewing.

01:31:06.417 --> 01:31:07.472
You have to remember.

01:31:07.472 --> 01:31:13.212
And, by the way, it's going to be in your subscriptions on your Apple phone, so you have to cancel from there.

01:31:13.212 --> 01:31:16.235
Thank God I got that one the day before they were in charge of me.

01:31:16.235 --> 01:31:19.974
Like 60 bucks, yikes, crazy, crazy, ridiculous.

01:31:19.974 --> 01:31:21.916
So if you're out there, you're vulnerable.

01:31:21.916 --> 01:31:23.519
Kev didn't like the.

01:31:23.519 --> 01:31:25.921
We're firing him, so what Tough shit?

01:31:25.921 --> 01:31:28.445
Hr said his behavior is out of control.

01:31:30.529 --> 01:31:41.326
Just leave the basement door unlocked on Fridays, imagine it got to the point where Kevin comes out and unlocks the door and walks upstairs.

01:31:41.326 --> 01:31:44.176
Thanks for letting us come in the studio.

01:31:44.176 --> 01:31:51.796
We'll leave you $20 a week on the table on the way out, so we just expect some type of food when we come in.

01:31:51.796 --> 01:31:53.721
And then you got to get out.

01:31:53.721 --> 01:32:00.518
We'll pay extra for craft services Because you have to get your treatment.

01:32:00.538 --> 01:32:02.426
Dude, you can't be like being in this environment.

01:32:02.426 --> 01:32:03.103
It's like the X being at Gappy.

01:32:03.103 --> 01:32:03.814
Dude, you can't be being in this environment.

01:32:03.814 --> 01:32:04.918
It's like the ex being a Gappies.

01:32:04.918 --> 01:32:06.515
You can't be in that environment.

01:32:06.515 --> 01:32:08.036
You've got to get right.

01:32:08.036 --> 01:32:10.033
Yeah, you've got to get yourself right.

01:32:10.033 --> 01:32:12.520
Admit the problem, say your apologies.

01:32:12.520 --> 01:32:13.614
We're here for you.

01:32:13.614 --> 01:32:15.997
I'm not even going to leave this bottle of Woodford here.

01:32:15.997 --> 01:32:19.051
Oh, when are interviews for the vacant chair, tom?

01:32:19.051 --> 01:32:20.895
We can actually start those interviews next week, tommy.

01:32:20.895 --> 01:32:22.159
Oh, when are interviews for the vacant chair, tom?

01:32:22.159 --> 01:32:24.527
We can actually start those interviews next week, tommy O, we'll send you the link.

01:32:24.527 --> 01:32:25.328
You can jump on anytime.

01:32:25.328 --> 01:32:29.019
Sure, sure, you were never fired, you left.

01:32:29.019 --> 01:32:34.923
Yeah, bro, seriously, you were like the chicks who don't show up on dates.

01:32:34.923 --> 01:32:35.909
You vacated the state.

01:32:35.909 --> 01:32:38.498
You're like the chicks who don't respond to messages.

01:32:38.498 --> 01:32:42.738
Just because you blocked Pat doesn't mean you can't come on the show, you ghosted us.

01:32:42.738 --> 01:32:47.631
Oh God, we had something nice, I thought.

01:32:47.631 --> 01:32:48.994
Did Kevin put a black?

01:32:48.994 --> 01:32:49.777
What is that?

01:32:49.777 --> 01:32:51.081
What?

01:32:51.081 --> 01:32:52.817
What's the fucking thing here?

01:32:52.817 --> 01:32:53.925
I can't even see it?

01:32:54.329 --> 01:32:55.551
Oh, I didn't even see that one.

01:32:55.551 --> 01:32:55.972
What did he do?

01:32:55.972 --> 01:32:56.514
What is it?

01:32:56.514 --> 01:32:59.118
Oh, yeah, it was a black middle finger.

01:32:59.118 --> 01:33:00.380
Okay, all right.

01:33:00.380 --> 01:33:03.204
On that note, ladies and gentlemen, thanks, alps.

01:33:03.204 --> 01:33:11.444
Thank you for joining us for a beautiful therapy session Friday nights with the TID show.

01:33:11.444 --> 01:33:15.994
Yeah, the good old mating game and spaceships.

01:33:15.994 --> 01:33:18.681
Keep an eye out for that 12-mile-long spaceship.

01:33:18.681 --> 01:33:24.497
Assuming Tom Schmidt Depends what state you're in Florida.

01:33:24.497 --> 01:33:28.804
Oh, it's Florida, it's probably Tom Schmidt, so we'll be back next week.

01:33:32.416 --> 01:33:32.595
Hopefully.

01:33:32.615 --> 01:33:33.860
Kevin's fully recovered.

01:33:33.860 --> 01:33:36.170
We'd like to see him back on the show if he's well.

01:33:36.170 --> 01:33:38.417
I don't know, I don't know.

01:33:38.417 --> 01:33:42.275
We've got to start putting water in the liquor bottles.

01:33:42.275 --> 01:33:47.194
Fuck, we do For his liquor bottles, not yours.

01:33:47.194 --> 01:33:51.618
Okay, that's fine, with a little something in there, doesn't matter.

01:33:51.618 --> 01:33:54.018
Can't expect me to get through this fucking thing without any booze.

01:33:54.018 --> 01:33:58.497
That's why I've been drinking so much is when he drinks heavy.

01:33:58.497 --> 01:33:59.680
I'm like I just want to forget it.

01:33:59.680 --> 01:34:05.255
I need to battle his drinking with my drinking Turning me into a fucking addict.

01:34:05.255 --> 01:34:06.640
It's so bad.

01:34:06.640 --> 01:34:13.037
But thank you for joining us once again on the fine episode of the Take it Deep Show Next week Orbs Intervention.

01:34:13.037 --> 01:34:18.594
Oh, and I totally forgot to mention the next couple of episodes.

01:34:18.594 --> 01:34:23.302
I'm going to reach out to that gentleman who I sent you, who's friends with?

01:34:23.302 --> 01:34:28.819
Oh yeah, he's friends with Donnie Brosco, the real Donnie Brosco, the real Donnie Brosco.

01:34:28.819 --> 01:34:32.657
Actually, I was watching a couple clips of Donnie talk some shit with Joe Rogan.

01:34:33.439 --> 01:34:34.780
Oh yeah, that shit was crazy yeah.

01:34:34.841 --> 01:34:39.305
Wait a minute, I have his card If you're interested.

01:34:39.305 --> 01:34:43.127
I also have somebody who comes on, who's a big boxing Boxing guy.

01:34:43.127 --> 01:34:48.716
Historian, knows a lot of shit about boxing, used to have a podcast about it.

01:34:48.716 --> 01:34:50.396
What's his name?

01:34:50.396 --> 01:34:54.113
It's one of my clients, mike Tyson.

01:34:54.113 --> 01:35:01.639
No, I mean, I thought that would be cool, so I don't know that he'd be able to hang with us.

01:35:01.639 --> 01:35:04.838
He'd probably fucking come here and look to knock somebody the fuck out.

01:35:04.838 --> 01:35:07.757
So the gentleman what the fuck?

01:35:07.757 --> 01:35:15.301
The gentleman's name is Ralph Friedman, and the reason why, when I saw him at the event that we were doing for work, I'm like God.

01:35:15.301 --> 01:35:16.143
He looks so familiar.

01:35:16.143 --> 01:35:21.953
He has a show on the Discovery Channel, oh Street Justice, the Bronx.

01:35:21.953 --> 01:35:23.996
So he's a retired cop from the city.

01:35:23.996 --> 01:35:27.601
Does a show about all of the crazy kids?

01:35:27.601 --> 01:35:28.864
Really stupid question.

01:35:31.152 --> 01:35:31.993
Uh-huh, uh-huh, Is he like maybe my height?

01:35:32.014 --> 01:35:34.296
a little taller than me, bushy mustache.

01:35:34.296 --> 01:35:37.001
No, okay, no, he's on Hulu.

01:35:37.001 --> 01:35:49.518
Hulu, yeah, he has a book out Uh-huh Street Warrior Detective Ralph Friedman and because of that he got a show from it.

01:35:49.518 --> 01:35:55.939
But he knows he's personal friends with Donnie Brasco and so I had asked him would you like to come on the show?

01:35:55.939 --> 01:35:56.762
He said he would love to.

01:35:56.762 --> 01:35:58.027
So I'm going to reach out to him.

01:35:58.027 --> 01:35:58.649
You should.

01:35:58.649 --> 01:36:00.654
I would love to hear your stories.

01:36:00.654 --> 01:36:09.020
Oh yeah, dude, cool dude, really nice guy, just straightforward, and we'll see what we can do.

01:36:09.020 --> 01:36:13.518
And maybe possibility, maybe Donnie Brosco.

01:36:15.373 --> 01:36:17.011
Doubt that, imagine we get Donnie Brosco on the show.

01:36:17.011 --> 01:36:18.414
I don't think that'll ever happen.

01:36:18.456 --> 01:36:18.817
Why not?

01:36:20.581 --> 01:36:23.515
Why not have him get a hold of them?

01:36:23.515 --> 01:36:24.899
Maybe get them on together?

01:36:24.899 --> 01:36:29.695
I mean, can I tell Don that I was rooting for lefty guns in the movie?

01:36:29.695 --> 01:36:33.554
I mean, is that wrong?

01:36:33.554 --> 01:36:34.918
Is that not right?

01:36:34.918 --> 01:36:39.097
I was hoping they figured you out, but it didn't happen.

01:36:39.097 --> 01:36:44.314
I can hear you, oh sorry.

01:36:44.314 --> 01:36:45.176
Was I talking out loud.

01:36:45.176 --> 01:36:52.546
I apologize, but once again, hopefully we get Ralph on the show in next future fucking episodes.

01:36:53.109 --> 01:36:53.329
Excellent.

01:36:53.810 --> 01:36:56.417
We got a couple new episodes coming out to Spotify soon.

01:36:56.417 --> 01:37:00.899
Yes, beautiful, I've just been fucking so ridiculous this week with the fucking fair.

01:37:00.899 --> 01:37:01.261
It's been insane.

01:37:01.261 --> 01:37:03.328
I'm not breaking your balls, I've just been fucking so ridiculous this week with the fucking fair.

01:37:03.328 --> 01:37:03.670
It's been insane.

01:37:04.250 --> 01:37:04.876
I'm not breaking your balls.

01:37:04.895 --> 01:37:05.399
I'm just asking questions.

01:37:05.399 --> 01:37:05.985
I'm breaking my own balls.

01:37:05.985 --> 01:37:06.470
I came, dude, no joke.

01:37:06.470 --> 01:37:12.137
I came home last was it last night From the fair and I had so much work to do.

01:37:12.137 --> 01:37:16.048
I got like two quotes done and I'm like I can't even fucking.

01:37:16.048 --> 01:37:17.652
How many days are you going to be at the fair?

01:37:17.652 --> 01:37:20.014
I'm going to be there tomorrow from 1 to 6.

01:37:20.014 --> 01:37:22.337
Okay, and then I'm not there Sunday.

01:37:22.337 --> 01:37:26.601
Is that the end of the fair this weekend, correct, fuck?

01:37:27.181 --> 01:37:30.265
I missed this fucking thing again, it hasn't been that great.

01:37:30.265 --> 01:37:33.396
Oh really, numbers have been down.

01:37:33.396 --> 01:37:34.225
We had rain the other night.

01:37:34.225 --> 01:37:37.860
Yesterday was decent, gary and I got a bunch of fucking appointments.

01:37:37.860 --> 01:37:43.813
Tomorrow should be real busy, so that time period I'm going to be at I should get a ton of appointments.

01:37:43.813 --> 01:37:46.039
I want you to come by and throw a corn dog at you.

01:37:50.193 --> 01:37:51.612
Gay pink shirt working OT.

01:37:51.612 --> 01:37:54.576
No, kevin, wow, wow.

01:37:54.576 --> 01:37:57.974
There's another fucking demerit to HR.

01:37:57.974 --> 01:37:59.097
Okay, here we go.

01:37:59.097 --> 01:38:02.074
This guy Fucking coming out gay pink shirt, you know what?

01:38:02.074 --> 01:38:06.296
He must have drank a bottle within the last 45 minutes because he's saying that shit.

01:38:06.296 --> 01:38:08.597
He's definitely had a couple drinks since he called in.

01:38:08.597 --> 01:38:10.377
Very angry, very angry.

01:38:10.377 --> 01:38:12.658
Can't believe you brought that up, disgusting.

01:38:12.658 --> 01:38:16.693
So what if I look pale and pacey with a fucking pink shirt on and look like I was going on a gay cruise?

01:38:16.693 --> 01:38:17.453
Who hasn't?

01:38:17.453 --> 01:38:19.716
I haven't, okay.

01:38:19.716 --> 01:38:21.637
Anyways, thank you for joining us.

01:38:21.637 --> 01:38:27.204
Ladies and gentlemen, until next time, me and Matt, fuck Kev what we do in life.

01:38:27.204 --> 01:38:28.105
Take it deep.

01:38:28.105 --> 01:38:34.899
Take it deep, kev, and use it in eternity.

01:38:34.899 --> 01:38:37.444
Orbs, we'll just leave these glasses here for you to clean up when you get home.

01:38:37.444 --> 01:39:27.550
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